Posts About ‘NFC’

Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game 2012: Championship Round

Thursday, January 17th, 2013

Well, I was right on about every game last week – except for Denver. That’s three out of four again. Look, the Broncos should have won that game – just like the Colts should have won the week before. Except the Broncos really fucked up. They had the single worst defensive play of the season when they gave up that TD with 30 seconds to go. Where did you think the pass was going to go? Why was a safety not standing on the goal line? They fucked that up, then in OT Peyton got pushed around and finally made a fatal error. I opined last week about Peyton’s ability to play in cold weather in the playoffs, and while I picked him to win I kind of knew that he wasn’t going to.

Both the Patriots and the Niners dominated, but only the Niners looked like a playoff team. Harbaugh held that read option look until the playoffs and it worked. The Falcons might be prepared for it, but I doubt that they’ll be fully prepared for it. The Packers are struggling lately in the playoffs, and that game made a strong case for the importance of a running game in a pass heavy league. They couldn’t establish a play action. Meanwhile the Patriots just keep scoring, no matter who Brady is throwing to. Doesn’t matter. While Joe Montana might have had Jerry Rice all those years, Brady doesn’t need just one guy, he can make any guy a star.

So this is the second to last column of the year, then a hiatus until the season kicks back up again. So you should be full of sadness. Me, I’m going to go cuddle with my guns before they are taken away. Just kidding. I don’t cuddle.

San Francisco at Atlanta – January 20, 2013, 3:00 PM ET +3.0 49.0 O/U
The first game kicks off in the Georgia Dome, which sucks for the Niners. I think they have that energy at home which really helps the team and Atlanta gets super lucky at home. Like last week, when they nearly gave the game away and just beat the Seahawks. Frankly, I’d love to pick the Falcons to win this game and I think they can, and might. But I have to put more value on Colin Kaepernik than one should put on a human being. The guy is a good pocket passer, has the patience of a veteran and makes RGIII look like a chicken with his head cut off. Whether it’s a designed run or a snap decision, the kid has his head on straight. Now, Harbaugh busted out the read option against the Packers who have no run defense and play a classic smash on the line. The Falcons also play a smash, but in preparing for either the Seahawks or Redskins with that week off, they prepared for a running QB. Their secondary just didn’t prepare for the deep ball. So that’s what it comes down to, if the Falcons can contain Kaepernik, and I don’t think they do. At least not for a whole game. He won’t peel off 181 against them, but he’ll get a couple runs, extending plays. For that, I’m taking the Niners to just edge out the Falcons, though I wouldn’t mind being proven wrong.

Baltimore at New England – January 20, 2013, 6:30 PM ET -8.5 51.0 O/U
In this rematch of last years AFC Championship game, not much has changed. Of course the Patriots are favored, but the Ravens are playing with some sort of fire, and you can credit Ray Lewis for that. The now cyborg ex-con is a locker room preacher and gets a team fired up. Joe Flacco, who played amazing last week to little or no fanfare, is still the key to the offense. The kid has a fantastic arm and uses it. The Patriots secondary will not be able to stop the deep ball, and this game will certainly come down to who can score the most points. The Patriots front seven and the defense will have to be on the ball this week, no flip flopping like they’ve done all season. Belichick always finds a way to win, or at least compete in these types of games. The real key for the Pats though is Welker. If he can continue to David Copperfield opponents, then a win is nearly guaranteed. I’m not too worried about Gronk being out, as Hernandez can carry that load and there will be plenty of tricks up the sleeve of the Hoodie. Patriots to win.

Now, for your entertainment, Bad Lip Reading does the NFL. Hilarious!

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game 2012: Divisional Weekend

Thursday, January 10th, 2013

So last week I went a respectable three out of four. I really did not expect the Colts to give it away like they did. Their front offensive line pretty much helped make it open season on young Andrew Luck. I really wanted the Colts to win because I like what they’ve been able to do this season and I really don’t like the Ravens. What I didn’t count on was Ray Lewis coming back, and getting like nine tackles. Without Ray Lewis, the Colts may have won that game. When I wrote the column last week, I didn’t know he was going to be back in.

So I’m writing this from a Starbucks in Planet Hollywood in Vegas where I finally have good WiFi. I’m here for CES and probably won’t even get to the convention floor. Meetings, meetings, meetings. I mean, meetings with the Roulette table. Oh yeah baby. So as I’m writing this, the guy next to me is having a sex chat with his girl via Skype. I can tell cause she’s wearing little, they went from verbal to typing and every time I glance over it’s like watching one of those porn videos people talk about. Thankfully, he’s keeping it classy by not unzipping right here.

Anyway, I better get this written up, I have a meeting in a few minutes at some hotel that I’ll probably get lost in. Actually, I want to ditch the meeting cause after researching the company it seems really super mega boring and I don’t want to do super mega boring right now. At least I’m not having ACL, MCL and every other CL surgery like RG3 right now. And at least I’m not fired like a shit ton of coaches, including now Rob Ryan, who will most likely not be working in NY with his brother. And at least I’m not Peyton Manning, who knows damn well he’s going to have to play in the cold against the Patriots next week. It’s inevitable.

Baltimore at Denver -9.5
The Ravens pose an interesting challenge for the Denver offensive line, can they control the speed and toughness of a recharged and pumped up defense? That’s the only key to this game. People are questioning Manning’s resolve, whether or not he can handle the week off and the cold weather, I think that isn’t a problem this week. I think the Broncos get an early lead and pound out the rest of the game, leaving Manning able to avoid the rush and save himself for next week, in the cold again, against the Patriots. The Ravens got lucky last week, with Lewis coming back, I don’t think they have the same energy this week, at least not after the first quarter. Broncos to win.

Green Bay at San Francisco -3.0
The big question for this game is how do the Packers contain Frank Gore? Earlier this year, he ripped off over 100 yards against the Packers, then watched as Adrian Peterson did it to the Packers in the last game of the season. However, the very next week the Packers figured something out as they held Peterson in check and were too much for the Vikings without their star running back. I think we could see them show the same defensive fronts against the Niners this week, the only x-factor being Colin Kaepernik. That kid can run, and unlike RG3, he’s got a much stronger physicality to him. He’s not going to twist an ankle getting tackled, and he’s going to use the read and spread option to confuse the defense because he can actually pass the ball. So the Niners then have to worry about Rodgers just lighting up their secondary in the nice weather in San Fran. Sure, he plays well in the cold, but he plays better when he’s comfortable and his receivers have warm hands. This game really could go either way, but I’m taking the Niners by a nose.

Seattle at Atlanta -1.0
The Seahawks were impressive last week, but it is not going to matter against the stronger offense of the Falcons. The Seahawks defense has been lights out against the run, and their secondary has been more than competent. The thing is, Matt Ryan and his top flight receivers in Julio Jones and Roddy White can do things that most teams cannot defend against. Those back shoulder throws, and getting the ball up high enough so that only those tall receivers can get it are just a few. Add to that the constant threat of play action and the arsenal of weapons at his disposal and the Falcons offense will be hard to beat. Of course, we know how the Falcons tend to choke in the post-season, so we’ll see if they do. But for now, I’m sticking with the Falcons to finally get that sweet post-season victory.

Houston at New England -9.5
Clearly you have noticed the trend here, I’m picking all home teams, and I’ve already picked the Patriots in the opening paragraph. So, as well as the Texans have done this season, defensively or otherwise, the Patriots are built for the playoffs and that’s why they are going to win. Patriots to win, with little discussion.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 11

Thursday, November 17th, 2011

My picks last week were like Vick's ribs

So last week, sucked. Let’s not talk about last week. It makes me very, very sad. Like super sad. Like mega super ultra sad. Let me just say this, I have never had a week as bad as last week. I’m tracking stats, so I’ll look at them next week. Until that point, I’m going to go soak my head. I’m supposed to be an expert right? Apparently not. So, that has kind of made me a little crazy. This week, I’m going off the deep end with my picks.

In other news, right now it’s around 6am pacific time as I’m writing this. The only reason that is significant is that I’m in Los Angeles attending the L.A. Auto Show. I wasn’t sure if there was even going to be a column this week, due to my schedule. But I can’t let my biggest fan @mbletsch down. So, I have about an hour to write this, so I’m going to knock down the normal 3000 word column and do the quick version. Each game will still be represented, my analysis is just going to be a bit more brief. So, let’s get it on! I’m getting hungry for some trendy breakfast.

Featured Game

Philadelphia at NY Giants Line: -3.5
This game is featured cause this is where the Eagles disappear. This where Sportscenter stops talking about the mathematical posibility of the Eagles making the playoffs. It’s not going to happen. They are going to lose this game, with Vince Young stepping in for a rib broken Mike Vick, and they are going to fade into obscurity. Good bye Eagles. Fuck off. Giants to win.

Tailgate City (The Rest)

NY Jets at Denver Line: +5.5
Vegas has taken out an over/under on Tebows completions at 11. I’m taking the over. He’s going to have to pass against the Jets. Their mega blitz is going to push him out of the box like crazy. That being said, the Broncos have the magic of Tebow and for that reason, and that reason alone I’m taking them to win at home. Yep.

Jacksonville at Cleveland Line: +1.0 CRAPFEST OF THE WEEK!!
Who cares? The Jags beat the Colts last week because Painter sucks. The Browns missed a game winning field goal because of the fucking long snapper. You have ONE job dude, and you messed it up. Go sell used cars. Browns to win at home.

Carolina at Detroit Line: -7.0
Detroit has lost three of the last four. What is going on with this team? They are falling fast, but they return home to that very loud crowd. Let’s see if Cam Newton can fight off the noise of the crowd, and the toughest defense he’s faced yet. However, that defense has been shit lately. I’m sticking with the Lions to win at home.

Tampa Bay at Green Bay Line: -14.0
Ha. This line is too generous. If the Bucs don’t lose by 35 points in Green Bay I’ll be surprised. I’m sure this young team would love to come back and get an upset win, but it’s not going to happen. Green Bay is your repeat Superbowl champion. I have no choice but to predict that happening. Green Bay to win at home.

Buffalo at Miami Line: -2.0
This match-up is one of my favorites every year. These two teams play each other like it’s a fucking playoff game. The rest of the year doesn’t matter when these rivals meet. While the Dolphins are on a hot streak right now, and the Bills are on a low streak they are meeting somewhere in the middle. I’m going off the diving board head first and picking the Dolphins to win. I have no idea why, just doing it.

Oakland at Minnesota Line: -1.0
Vikings aren’t looking too bad. I mean, they got smoked by the Packers last week, but they aren’t sucking it up really. Ponder is showing great progression as a starting QB. The Raiders, are winning their division but only by one game. The whole division behind them is tied. They have to win this game. They won’t. Peterson is going to slice them up. I’m taking the Vikings to win at home.

Dallas at Washington Line: +8.0
Did you see the Cowboys last week? They were dominant. Did you see the Redskins last week? Name their starting QB. Didn’t think so. Shanahan is losing it, his decision making suggests dementia. The Cowboys are going to make the Redskins home crowd all sad and shit. Cowboys to win.

Cincinnati at Baltimore Line: -9.0 UPSET SPECIAL!!
The Ravens went to Seattle and lost. A week after beating the Steelers for the second time this year. Finally, they are back home after their stupid west coast trip and welcome the Bengals. The Bengals lost to the Steelers last week, knocking them back to reality. Can they hurdle the Ravens this week? I think this is the upset brewing. I think the Ravens offense is confused right now for some reason, and Dalton held it together against the Steelers, it wasn’t a blowout. It was a loss. I’m taking the Bengals to upset.

Seattle at St. Louis Line: -3.0
The Seahawks surprisingly beat the Ravens last week, and the Rams got lucky against the Browns. Who cares? The Niners seal up the division with a win today, finally ending the sadness of a losing team getting to the playoffs from the NFC West. For the rest of the year, these two teams are playing for second place, with no chance of smelling the ass crack of the playoffs. Who cares who wins this game? Whatever. I’m taking the Rams.

Arizona at San Francisco Line: -10.0
Meh. Niners to win and complete their amazing rise to power. Next stop, playoffs.

Tennessee at Atlanta Line: -6.5
The Oilers, er, Titans are the up and down, hot and cold team of the year. They had a great week last week, but who knows how they are going to be this week? The Falcons blew it in overtime to the Saints. You’ve gotta run some fucking misdirection on fourth and short plays! It was a good decision, just bad execution. I think the Falcons hold it together this week and rebound with a strong win, staying in the race for the NFC South. Falcons at home.

San Diego at Chicago Line: -4.0
The Chargers are the other hot and cold team. Actually, they are just cold. They are painful to watch, and I’m glad I’m not a Chargers fan. The good news is they are in a 3 way tie for second place in the division, so they still have a shot. They don’t have a shot against the Bears at home though, who have been dominating lately. That win against the Lions was fucking huge. HUGE. Bears to win at home.

Kansas City at New England Line: -14.5
Upset special… just kidding. The Patriots are looking more like the Patriots, but what the hell is up with the defense lately? They are making it harder for Brady and the offense. And he finally passed down the field to Ochocinco. You have to use that deep threat more often to open up the play action, just like using the run. Do it. Patriots to win.

In the Sauna (Bye Week Teams)

Bye Week at Indianapolis
The Colts, ugh. Suck for Luck right?

Bye Week at New Orleans
The Saints still have some work to do if they want to win the division. They have to keep the Falcons at bay. Cause the wild card is not coming from this division. It’s going to be the Bears or the Lions.

Bye Week at Pittsburgh
The Steelers can’t coast to the division title this year. The Ravens and the Bengals are making it a fight. A fight worth watching. Like two hot chicks at a frat party fighting in the pool. Take it off! Take it off!

Bye Week at Houston
Everyone keeps saying that this is the year for Houston. Until Schaub got injured last week. Now, he’ll probably be out for the season. So can Houston keep winning? I think so, because it’s been the running game and the defense that has been winning games.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: 2011 NFC Predictions

Thursday, August 11th, 2011

Yes. I'm predicting the Lions will reach the playoffs. What of it? (Image: US Presswire)

NFC East

NY Giants
All I gotta say for the Giants this year is good luck. The offensive line that once started 38 games in a row has all but dissolved, leaving Eli in a very unfortunate position. He has only been as successful as he has because of a strong O line, without that, he’s going to be in trouble. Not to mention the departure of TE Kevin Boss, who leaves behind a couple tight ends that may or may not be stars in the making. Expect Eli to be relying on his deep receivers to cover the slants, which will hurt them on the deep routes. The defense is a whole nother issue, as there are no clear cut leaders on that side of the ball. The Giants missed the playoffs last year with ten wins, they’ll miss the playoffs this year with less.

Dallas Cowboys
After giving up a team record 436 points last year, and finishing a weak ass 6-10, the Cowboys have brought in defensive mind Rob Ryan (and his massive stomach) to hopefully fix the holes. Bradie James, DeMarcus Ware and Marcus Spears have already been whining about the learning curve associated with Ryan’s defensive plans. However, these guys are veteran professionals and I expect that the Cowboys defense will be much, much stronger this year. Jason Garrett will be coaching again, and Tony Romo is returning as healthy as ever. So will the Cowboys compete in their division? I expect that they will. Will they make the playoffs? If their defense holds up, I expect that they will.

Washington Redskins
The Redskins went hogwild with departures & additions. Haynesworth, McNabb, Chris Wilson, Clinton Portis, Vonnie Holliday and more are gone. Incoming players include Tim Hightower, Donte Stallworth, Kellen Clemens and a slate of rookies. Shanahan is already putting the team in a funk, with making John Beck and Rex Grossman fight for the starting job. You can’t do that going into a season, he better make up his mind damn quick like. Neither of these QB’s can give this team a chance to win, so this is a really quick conversation. Expect the Redskins to suck, especially on the offensive side of the ball. The defense will probably end up scoring more points when all is said and done.

Philadelphia Eagles
Is this the team to beat in the NFC? On paper, sure, the Eagles are looking pretty hot. But I’m going to say this now – they won’t even win the division. Yes, the addition of Vick and Young will change the dynamic of the offensive game. Ronnie Brown will pick up where Westbrook left off, as far as the dominant running back. And the addition of Rodgers-Cromartie and Nnamdi Asomugha in the CB position will only make the defense stronger, but shit, it isn’t going to matter if Vick and/or Young fail. Vick is one side tackle or bad run away from another injury, while Young is about as consistent as a horse drawn carriage with Styrofoam wheels on a brick road. Not to mention a new rookie kicker, a defensive coordinator who was an offensive line coach since 1985 and an offensive line whom I still don’t have faith in to protect the QB. Sure, all this could add up to total win, or total disaster.

NFC North

Green Bay Packers
I’m still dancing from predicting at the beginning of the 2010 season that the Packers would win the Superbowl. Or at least go to the Superbowl. So what, do you think I should go two years in a row with that prediction? Well, Rodgers has plenty of targets to throw to, and his connection with Finley is only growing stronger. Hot running back James Starks will be competing with Ryan Grant for the starting job, with badass prospect Alex Green out of Hawaii
waiting right there to get in the game. The offense is no question going to be high scoring, high flying and lights out. The defense is also back and stronger than ever. Clay Matthews is joined by Brad Jones & Frank Zombo, all hungry and at full health. I don’t think this team will have the dreaded Superbowl hangover at all. I’m putting them right back in the playoffs, this time taking the division crown with them.

Chicago Bears
The Bears surprised everyone with their playoff run last year, even having a league worst 56 sacks allowed. However, no one was surprised by their late exit in the playoffs at the hands of the Packers. This year, they have shaken up the O-line in the hopes that Jay Cutler has time to throw to some new blood, courtesy of the Cowboys. Roy Williams, Marion Barber and Sam Hurd join the offensive ranks in Chicago. Also notable is Matt Spaeth coming in to replace Greg Olsen at tight end. The problem with the Bears is going to stem from an aging defense who is going to tire during the hot games, and freeze up during the cold ones. I’d expect some rookies to start rotating in midway through the season on the defensive side. Meanwhile, it’s going to be up to Devin Hester once again to force teams to make mistakes by being bold. He’s the spark of this team, but I don’t see that being enough to propel them back into the playoffs this year, save for the Vikings outlook, which isn’t that great.

Minnesota Vikings
The phone call never came. The reality of a Brett Favre-less universe hit the Vikings like a cold brick. Can Donovan McNabb lead this team to the playoffs? I don’t think so. Thankfully, they have a good rookie QB in Christian Ponder and it’s my advice to the Vikings to treat this like a rebuilding year and play the kid under McNabb, let the veteran show him the ropes and rebuild the team around him. McNabb has a one year deal, you know that Joe Webb won’t be playing QB so just start Ponder. Meanwhile, Sidney Rice is gone, replaced by Michael Jenkins who is just as fast. Harvin will move up to the number one receiver. The big deal is the defensive line, after coach Frazier released Bryant “Mount” McKinnie who was the most popular guy on the line. Yeah, he was out of shape and Frazier is all “I mean business” but it’s gonna fuck up morale. Already the line is showing signs of sucking. No playoffs for this team, not this year.

Detroit Lions
The Lions biggest challenge this year will be keeping their offensive line healthy, and having the depth to back them up when they are not. Stafford is back to throwing lasers, and all he needs is an offensive line that won’t let him touch the ground. The really good news for the Lions is the defense. Led by Ndamukong Suh, LB Stephen Tulloch (160 combined tackles last season) and Justin Durant, the front seven is looking strong – very strong. This is a defense that can break some records for the Lions and help this team push for a strong season. Playoffs? I dunno. At this point it’s really hard to tell if the offense is going to be able to score more points than the other teams offense, but again, it comes down to that O-line. Either way, the Lions will not suck this year, I expect them to compete at a high level, maybe even for a wild-card spot.

NFC South

Tampa Bay Buccaneers
I live in the Tampa Bay area, so I’ve been getting a lot of heat surrounding my picks for this division. Look, the Bucs are a young team this year – something we haven’t been able to say about them in a long, long time. Josh Freeman is the real deal at Quarterback and is the only reason Raheem Morris still has a job – as both the head coach and defensive coordinator. So can he successfully do both this year with defensive lynchpin Barrett Ruud leaving the team? The deal is going to be can the Bucs rush the ball? In the NFC South, the rush is more important than anything on offense. Yes, LeGarrette Blount rushed for over 1k yards last year but he’s clearly got an anger problem. And if he gets injured? Then what? Earnest Graham is so-so at best and who is Kregg Lumpkin? Thankfully, the Bucs can easily fall back on their strong receiving core. A surprising 10-6 last year, I can see them repeating that, if not doing better. A playoff spot awaits this team, as much as I hate saying that.

New Orleans Saints
The thing you have to understand about the Saints under coach Sean Payton is to expect the unexpected. Keeping that in mind, it was time for players like Reggie Bush & Jeremy Shockey to hit the road. I was a bit surprised that they released Gay, but perhaps he is aging a bit in the CB position. This division was so tough last year, the Saints at 11-5 were only good enough for second in the division and a wild-card, which they lost in a shocker to the Seahawks. Bush was almost a non-factor last year, which should make inserting Mark Ingram into the lineup even more interesting. He joins Pierre Thomas & Darren Sproles behind the O-line. There is no one singular “guy” which makes this team so dangerous. I mean, save for Drew Brees who had a bit of a down year in 2010. The only problems still lie a bit on defense, as they just couldn’t seem to rack up the sacks last year. I expect the Saints to slip a bit this year and have a half and half year.

Atlanta Falcons
After going 13-3 last year, then losing to the Packers in the NFC divisional round, the Falcons are looking to bounce back strong. Drafting Julio Jones from Alabama was definitely a step in the win now direction. This team is not rebuilding or taking a year off, they will be coming out of the gate firing. Defensive end Ray Edwards will be joining John Abraham on the line to help with the pass rush that seemed to be missing a bit last year. The Falcons need that pass rush to give their secondary that extra time to make the big plays that we know that they can. Matt Ryan is yet to win a post-season game as a starter, but I expect that to change this year as the Falcons once again take the division and head deep into the playoffs.

Carolina Panthers
If there is any team in rebuilding phase, it’s this one. They spent a ton of money re-signing core offensive and defensive line players, then topped that with the signing of Cam Newton. They also added Derek Anderson to join Jimmy Clausen on the bench in case Cam is a bust. At this point, I don’t think any of these quarterbacks gives this team a chance to win – at this point. The biggest problem for the Panthers is going to be all the coaching changes. New head coach Ron Rivera is joined by Rob Chudzinski as offensive coordinator and Sean McDermott as defensive coordinator. That’s a lot of new systems to learn in such a short period, and it will be interesting to see if they can catch on before they start worrying about finishing with another losing season.

NFC West

St. Louis Rams
This team is going to be interesting to watch this year. The loss of Oshiomogho Atogwe, who accounted for more takeaways than any other NFL player over the last six seasons will be felt in the secondary. They also picked up Cadillac Williams, a player never earning his potential and Jerious Norwood, both backing up the only reason this team wins at all – Stephen Jackson. New offensive coordinator Josh McDaniels should spice things up a bit, and considering the division they are in, they have a pretty damn good shot at winning it with a losing record. Gotta love that shit.

Arizona Cardinals
If the Rams don’t win the division, it’s going to be the Cardinals. Kevin Kolb is a lot better quarterback than people give him credit for, kind of like Matt Cassel. Now he’s got that rare second shot, riding high off his play with the Eagles. In addition, he’s got some new friends to throw the ball to in WR Chansi Stuckey and rookie DeMarco Sampson, the hot hands receiver from San Diego State. The questions looming are if Beanie Wells can carry the running game, and if playing rookies in the secondary is going to pay off. I say this will be an exciting team to watch, high scoring for sure, but if the defense can’t keep up with the other teams offense, it won’t matter.

Seattle Seahawks
The Hasselbeck era has come to a close, and so has the Seahawks surprising winning ways. Tavaris Jackson is the starting quarterback, with Charlie Whitehurst ready to inevitably relieve him. Neither QB is going to pull this team close enough to smell the playoffs, and they have an outside chance at a winning season. The good news is that with some recent re-signings and injury recoveries the defense is back on it’s feet. For the first half of last season, the Seahawks had the #2 run defense in the league, and that type of stat should return if they can stay healthy. If they can’t then we may as well write off the Seawhawks at that point, since the defense is going to be the only bright spot on this team. Pete Carroll is rebuilding this team, and they have a way to go.

San Francisco 49′ers
Hey, it’s Alex Smith and Braylon Edwards, together again. They were in the same draft class, and now they join each other on the field of battle. This will be a good combination to watch, it’s too bad that the Niners offensive line will be too shitty to give Smith a chance to get off those lovely deep passes to Edwards. The Niners are in for a shock this season, as if their 6-10 record last year was a shock. New head coach Jim Harbaugh has his work cut out for him this year for sure. The Niners fans will be hanging their heads for most of the season unfortunately.

Next week: AFC Predictions

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: The Free Agent Shuffle

Friday, August 5th, 2011

See ya next year Randy.

As the 2011 NFL Season finally approaches, you have no doubt been trying to keep up with all the moves taking place in the NFL. A lot of players have switched teams, some voluntarily, some being traded and some just getting lucky to be offered a job. Others are still in the wind, as many teams are struggling to fit their salaries under cap, and other players have simply decided it’s time to just hang up the cleats. Well, I’ve been trying to keep up with the moves as well, and there have been plenty of them. The question is, will any of these moves help the teams win games, or is it just all about the bottom line? I’ll take a look at some of the major moves and give my two cents.

We should probably start with the retirements. First, Brett Favre is still retired. There was only a hint of a rumor that a team was thinking of talking to him, but both camps quickly denied that happening. This is a good thing for football, as the lock-out drama was enough to contend with. The biggest new retiree is Randy Moss, which came as a bit of a surprise to many. It seemed the 34 year old veteran still had some gas in the tank left, even though he was way down in touches last year. I think a player like that, it’s hard for him to accept a position second or third on the depth chart, but that’s where he’ll be if he decided to stay in the league. From a different perspective, he’s retiring on a high note, not run out of the league and with certain hall of fame numbers. Chances are though, he won’t stay retired.

As for the other major name retiring after 11 NFL seasons, Mark Bulger. But no one really gives a shit. They didn’t seem to care when he was playing, and they don’t seem to care now. Sorry Mark. Also, Kerry Collins will be joining Mark on the retired QB list, though I can see Kerry Collins making an easy move to the booth, a la Rich Gannon. Now, let’s take a look at some of those free agency moves. This might be a little ADHD as I hop around the league, but it’s all there. I’ll try to go in order of *former team* by division. With a few exceptions. Whatever. Like you give a shit how it reads.

The Ravens gave guard Marshal Yanda a huge $32M deal, with took up a huge chunk of cap. So Gaither is gone to the Raiders, McClain has headed to Denver, Heap is gone to the Cardinals. Mason and McGahee are still in the wind, having been released but surprisingly no one has picked up either player yet. I can see Mason getting a starting job somewhere, but McGahee is washed up. The Ravens also franchised DT Haloti Ngata.

The Bengals re-signed Benson and the Browns dropped Delhomme like a bad cold. He’ll be lucky if he can find a clipboard holding job this year. The Steelers re-signed Ike Taylor, William Gay, Willie Colon & LaMarr Woodley was given the franchise tag. This ensures the Steelers will have another great defensive year.

Let’s see, the Titans cleaned house. Collins & Moss retired. Babin went to the Eagles, as did Vince Young. Bo Scaife, Chris Simms & Marques Douglas are all in the wind at this point, I imagine they’ll re-sign Scaife because they need a TE, but Simms is questionable. The kid certainly ain’t his father. I’m thinking they’ll keep him as a backup to Hasselbeck, who they just got for 3 years & $21M.

The Jags lost Durant to the Lions and Sims-Walker to the Rams. He’s getting a nice $3.7M 1-year deal, which considering he’s a 3rd down receiver, that’s not too bad. Expect him to get a bigger role there.

Not too much movement with the Colts, they predictably kept Addai and Vinatieri. They are yet to sign back-up RB Rhodes, but they should before pre-season starts. He’s probably going to be competing against some rookies for the #2 spot.  Speaking about #2 spots, the Texans re-signed Matt Leinart who would love to be starting, but it’s probably never going to happen again for him. No other huge outgoing moves for the Texans besides holding on to WR Jacoby Jones. Oh yeah, and getting Danieal Manning from the Bears for a 4-yr, $20 mil deal.

No word yet on Chad Pennington of the Dolphins, he’s not expected to return to the team though. The good news is that Jason Taylor is returning to the team. He left a huge gap in the emotional play of the defense, and even though this will probably be his last season, it’s good that he’s finishing out a stellar career with the Fins. Matt Moore is coming over from Carolina, likely to be the starter in Miami. As for Ronnie Brown, he’s gone. In his place, the Dolphins signed Reggie Bush. Though I think Brown is a much better RB when it comes to down after down play. It’s unknown at this point if Ricky will be there to back up Reggie.

Nothing substantial from the Bills, besides acquiring who-dat QB Tyler Thigpen from the Dolphins.
The Patriots made the most surprising moves, signing both Albert Haynesworth and Chad Ochocindo, two player notorious for their antics. Obviously, the Pats have done this before and both these players will either adapt or find themselves looking for a new team. They also re-signed Sammy Morris, Faulk and Matt Light, while cutting about 7 other veterans. The Jets also signed a troubled player in Plaxico Burress, but at the same time have left Braylon Edwards in the win. Due to them handing over $50M in a 5 year deal to Santonio Holmes, Edwards is probably as good as gone. Good news for kicking fans, Nick Folk is sticking around for at least another year.

Vincent Jackson signed the franchise tag with the Chargers, while Sproles heads to the Saints and Floyd is unknown. The Raiders lost Zach Miller to the Seahawks and Gradowski (who is only slightly better than Simms) to the Bengals. The big loss was Nnamdi Asomugha who signed a huge 5 year $60M deal with the Eagles. Massive. He’ll be deadly out there at the CB spot, tightening up an Eagles defense who certainly needs the help in the secondary No big crazy moves from the Chiefs or Broncos, as far as anyone getting the boot. The Chiefs did nab Steve Breaston from the Cards though.

Drew Stanton is coming back to Detroit for another year, which is nice for him I guess. Linebackers Bobby Carpenter and Julian Peterson are unsigned as of the moment, but they’ll probably be back on the team soon. Interesting news from the Packers, as they lose Nick Barnett to the Bills for a 3-yr $12M deal. Brandon Jackson is heading to the Browns, and Kuhn is unsigned. The good news is Crosby is coming back with a nice kicker’s deal, 5 years, $14.75M. The Vikings also resigned their kicker, Ryan Longwell. Other than that, they got cherry picked by Seattle with both Sidney Rice and Tavaris Jackson heading to the Northwest.

The Panthers spent some of that cap money. DE Charles Johnson for $76M, DeAngelo Williams at $43M, Ryan Kalil franchised and James Anderson & Thomas Davis resigned as well. Will this help the Panthers compete this year? Who the hell knows. We’ll see when the season starts. Aside from Michael Jenkins going to the Vikings, the offensive team of Snelling & Norwood are currently unsigned. The Falcons running game was second to none last year, and they’ll need these two behind the O-line to compete.  The Saints are sitting with a lot of unsigned free agents as well, but the big news out of the NFC south is the Bucs losing Barrett Rudd to the Titans. Rudd was the lynchpin of that defense since Brooks left. The Bucs are going to be a mess on defense this year.

Marion Barber, gone. Roy Williams, gone. Offensive Linemen Marc Colombo & Leonard Davis – gone. Kris Brown, gone. The Cowboys are in the middle of a huge cleanup. The Redskins, Giants, Cardinals, Niners & Seahawks don’t have much going on besides the whole Hasselbeck deal. As for the Eagles, Vick got the ‘ol franchise tag. They also picked up Vince Young. This should be interesting.

For a full list of moves, click over to this handy-dandy chart on CBS Sports.

Next week – I’ll talk rookies and new staff as we get into my annual AFC Predictions! Boo-ya!

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Wild-Card Weekend

Thursday, January 6th, 2011
Rodgers vs. Vick

Rodgers and Vick - who will prevail? (Images: AP)

What needs to be said about this past season that hasn’t been said by a million other sports pundits? It was a wild NFL season with lots of drama, lots of Randy Moss whining, lots of coaches getting fired and of course – Brett Favre’s average sized shlong. Yes, it was a typical NFL season in America.

As the regular season came to a close, I couldn’t help but wonder about the shining turds playing as the NFC West champions. With their back-up QB, they beat the best/worst team in the NFC West to secure a spot in the playoffs with a losing record. What a shame that the NFL is allowing this to happen. If this doesn’t scream for a rule change, I don’t know what does. Hell, I hate to root for the Bucs, but they should have gotten in over the Seahawks, actually it would have been the Giants. Fuck the Bucs.

Well, here we are in the playoffs and I’m a bit depressed. This means that I only have a few NFL columns left to write this season, not to pick up again until August with my AFC & NFC previews. Until then, I figured that I’d fill this space with random sports news of the week, adding in my awesome commentary. Cause that’s how I roll. Anyway, it’s Wild-Card weekend, let’s get our picks on!

No. 6 New York Jets (11-5) at No. 3 Indianapolis Colts (10-6)
The Jets have found themselves in the playoffs even through controversy, mediocre offense and Mark Brunnell taking the snaps to give Sanchez a rest. Of course, the game against the Bills had no impact on their playoff spot. They are the Wild-Card and they are traveling to Lucas Oil to get beat by the Colts. Whoops, did I give that away too soon? No matter how the Colts played during the season, they finished strong and with a lot of injuries to their starters. The rest of the team stood up, and they made a run with Peyton at the helm to get ‘er done and put the Jags and Titans down to secure the division. The Jets are good, especially on run defense. The Colts will have trouble running against them, which is to be expected. But it’s Peyton’s arm they should be afraid of. Meanwhile, the Colts have to watch out for the same for Sanchez. The key to victory for the Colts is shutting down the deep ball and forcing the Jets to keep it short. Nearly the same for the Colts. However, I’m sticking with Peyton in this one, so that they can eventually lose to the Patriots. Colts at home.

No. 5 New Orleans Saints (11-5) at No. 4 Seattle Seahawks (7-9)
No no no no no. The Seahawks do not belong. This is like one of those pictures where everything looks the same and the question is “what doesn’t belong?” The Seahawks, that’s what. They don’t belong. The Giants should have been let in the playoffs with a 10-6 record, or even the Bucs over the 7-9 Seahawks. That being said, they went up against the Rams last week in a win it or go home game and they won it. So you’ve got to give them credit for that. Not only that, but they did it with backup QB Charlie Whitehurst rather than Hasselbeck, who still may not start this weekend when the Saints come into town. The only thing that the Seahawks have going for them, especially against a good team is Leon Washington returning punts. Know how to nullify him? Kick it out of bounds. Even as banged up as the Saints are, and having to travel to the west coast, the Seahawks won’t be able to stop or slow down the offense. This should be a blowout. Saints on the road.

No. 5 Baltimore Ravens (12-4) at No. 4 Kansas City Chiefs (10-6)
The Chiefs have had a very impressive season, finishing not only with a winning record but with one of the best offenses in the league. They strike with speed and wicked precision from Matt Cassel. However, without him they seemed to stumble and Cassel, while not a true pocket passer, loses a lot of his accuracy when he’s rushed. The Ravens, they like to rush quarterbacks. They put the pressure on and keep the pressure on and they usually do it with a three man front. Ed Reed is a monster in the secondary and will get in front of at least one ball in this game to take it away. The Chiefs have a slight advantage at home, and in order to win they need to strike fast and quick and rely on their defense to keep the game close. Flacco is cool under pressure, but he’s gotta be able to hand the ball off quickly as the defensive front for the Chiefs is quick and strong. I’m going out on a limb here, but the Chiefs have had a hell of a run and the Ravens will lose to the Steelers anyway. I’m taking the Chiefs at home.

No. 6 Green Bay Packers (10-6) at No. 3 Philadelphia Eagles (10-6)
The Packers opened up their season with a win at Philly. Now they return to Philly to face Vick instead of Kolb. The Packers beat the Bears in a very convincing win to push their way into the playoffs ahead of the Giants and the Bucs. Rodgers has been beat up this year, the running game has been suspect and the defense has had a few bad days – especially in the secondary. However, towards the end of the season they tightened up and became quite formidable. The Packers defense will have the daunting task of keeping Vick contained. That’s really the only key to the game, keep Vick contained and they should win. Vick still runs when he senses a defensive back or linebacker, sometimes ill advised. Yes, he cuts out a big play every once in a while, but pay attention to the failures in his run – especially when he gets pressured and the secondary is keeping up their coverage. Think back to the Chicago loss, that’s exactly what they did. The Packers need to do the same. If not, the Eagles will definitely win this game. However, I think the Packers defense can contain Vick, so I’m taking the Packers to win on the road and advance.

That’s it. Wild-Card weekend in four paragraphs. Next week: playoffs round two.

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The Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week One

Thursday, September 9th, 2010

Adrian Peterson is out for revenge against the Saints

Welcome to the official first edition of the Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game column. Here’s what you can expect from now until the Superbowl: sideways and illogical analysis sometimes being absolutely spot on, yet sometimes so far off it’s laughable; jokes at the expense of Ryan Leaf & JaMarcus Russell; some loose fantasy predictions; and advice on how to gamble away the rent money.

That being said, I would advise ignoring the lines this week. Most bookies are just getting a feel for how they can screw you this season, so the lines are really close to the vest. Plus, most of the play is divisional play, so that’ll be a good indicator of how these teams might play next week, so the bookies can adjust the lines. Either way, don’t hold me accountable if you lose money. I didn’t take the cash out of your wallet and hand it to the bookie behind the Circle K.

Alright, sit back, pop open a nice ice cold Pabst Light and let’s get it on!

Featured Game:

Vikings at Saints Line: -6.0
After the NFC Championship game last season, there is a now iconic image of Adrian Peterson, standing in the tunnel by himself, watching the Saints celebrate their win. He wanted to know what it felt like to win that game, to get the invite to the Superbowl. It was within his grasp and he knew it. Whether or not he felt Favre threw the game away with risky passes is neither here nor there, now Peterson and the Vikings get a chance for at least some redemption. Meanwhile the Saints have statistics on their side as the last 10 Superbowl winning teams have won their next season opener. This is going to be a Thursday night game you don’t want to miss. Two amazing offenses, two strong defenses and oh, did I mention Brett Favre? I’m taking the Vikings to pull off the upset.

Tailgate City (the Rest):

Dolphins at Bills Line: +3.0
Chad Henne opens up at the place where he had his worst game last season, the cloudy city of Buffalo, NY. This used to be a heated rivalry, but in recent years the Bills have been so bad that they are sad to watch. Every year I pick one team that I will always bet against. For years it was the Cardinals, then the Niners, last two years it was the Lions. This year, I’m taking the Bills and the Bucs to go on my ‘no gamble’ list. Take Miami to win if you must, but I’d just as soon not bother with this one.

Lions at Bears Line: -6.5
The only exciting thing about this early divisional match-up is going to be watching Ndamukong Suh in regular season action. What a better way to start than against the Bears on the road? Jay Cutler, watch out. Matt Forte will most likely be able to run at will against the Lions weak D-Line. If you have any Bears players on your fantasy team this would be the week to start them. This is one of the few games that I would recommend actually taking the points. Right now before the line goes up to -7.0.

Raiders at Titans Line: -6.5
There is no way the Raiders are going to start off the season with a massive upset of the Titans. This game is lopsided, but look at that line. 6.5? Less than a TD when you know that the Titans are going to smash the Radiers by at least two TD’s. And a safety. Chris Johnson is going to run all over the black and silver, hopefully not getting too much stuck in his cleats. Easily a 150 yard game for him. Expect Vince Young to taunt the entire Raiders D-line with ridiculous runs. Take the Titans with the points.

Bengals at Patriots Line: -4.5
To me it seems that Tom Brady is teetering on the edge between greatness and retirement. He just seems like a fragile snow globe at this point, I’m not sure why. With Welker back from injury and looking like the great receiver that he is, the Patriots have a shot to open strong this season. The Bengals mean well, I’m sure they want to win, but there is no way that Palmer has reached a level of communication with T.O. that will help them gain yards – for now. Expect much yelling by both Ochocinco and T.O. on the sidelines, at the coach, at the ref and at no one in general. I’m taking the Pats, but just barely and only cause they are at home.

Panthers at Giants Line: -7.0 !!UPSET SPECIAL!!
Bad kitty. Bad kitty. Oh wait, Delhomme is gone. Now it’s Matt Moore to Steve Smith for the touchdown! No wait, Eli Manning to Steve Smith for the touchdown! Eli and the Giants have only gone one way since their Superbowl win – down. The lines on both sides of the ball aren’t what they used to be, but the defense is a little bit stronger. However, some of the best downhill runners reside on the Carolina roster, including Jonathan Stewart who rolled the Giants for 206 yards in their final meeting of the year last year. The Giants open at home in their brand new very expensive stadium, it’s sad that they’ll open with a loss. I’m taking the Panthers to upset on the road.

Falcons at Steelers Line: -2.5
Rothlesberger is out. Holmes is gone. Leftwich is out. Dennis Dixon is starting. The Steelers offense is like JaMarcus Russell at a buffet line, everything has been picked through. Now, Hines Ward is still there and the defense is still strong as all get out. But can they stop the high flying pass wacky offense of the Falcons? The Falcons also have a strong ground attack with a momentarily healthy Michael Turner, but the Steelers defense is all healthy now as well, after showing some fatigue late last season. I’m taking the Falcons on the road, but this one really could go either way.

Browns at Buccaneers Line: -3.0 !!CRAP FEST OF THE WEEK!!
Do I have to? If this game is the one being shown in your home market, as it will be in my home market of Tampa, you may want to find something else to watch. I think Bowling is on ESPN. This game will either be a high scoring affair due to bad defense, or a low scoring affair due to bad offense. As mentioned earlier, the Bucs are on my no bet list so I’ll automatically take the Browns. That aside, I actually would pick the Browns to win just because their running backs aren’t as broken and their receiving core isn’t actually that bad. Delhomme…. nevermind. He should have retired. I’m going to start chanting “Colt Colt Colt” now.

Broncos at Jaguars Line: -3.0
This game will probably be played in the rain, as the forecast for this weekend isn’t looking so good south of the Georgia border. Orton will be getting used to life without Brandon Marshall, while the Jags will be relying on the legs of Jones-Drew more than ever now that Fred Taylor is gone. In a muddy, under attended game the Broncos defense might have trouble stopping David Garrard from going deep more than once. I’d take the Jags with the points, as coach McDaniels will be throwing his clipboard mid-way through the second quarter.

Colts at Texans Line: +2.5
Stat of the day: Matt Schaub led the league with 4,770 passing yards last year. 270 more than reigning Superbowl loser Peyton Manning. The Colts are coming into this season opener pissed off at losing the Superbowl to the Saints. They will be looking to start off strong by taking a strong grudge out on the Texans. You shouldn’t count the Texans down based on that though. Count them down by the Colts receiving core of Wayne, Clark, Garcon & Collie. Count them down because linebacker Brian Cushing is out. Count them down because of the young set of running backs they have in the backfield. Colts with the points. Note to the Texans though, if you lose this one, you better beat the Colts in Indy later this year, otherwise – no playoffs.

Arizona at St. Louis Line: +4.0
Am I the only one that thinks Derek Anderson is a good quarterback? He was given the bums rush in Cleveland after nearly leading them to the playoffs. Where is Charlie Frye now? So he gets a chance at succeeding in Arizona, now that Leinhart has been dumped. He doesn’t have Boldin to throw to, but he’s got Fitzgerald. He’s also got newly aquired Joey Porter on the D-line, who is sure to be in Sam Bradford’s face more than a few times. Bradford will be able to count the lines in Porters angry forehead by the end of the game. Expect Bradford to be on his back more than a lot lizard during Christmas shipping season. Take the Cardinals with the points.

Packers at Eagles Line: -3.0
I don’t see how the Eagles are favored in this game. Maybe because they are at home in their ultra-violent stadium, full of drunk and obnoxious idiots. Who will be real pissed when Aaron Rodgers puts up 200+ yards on them this weekend. And not just cause he’s my starting fantasy quarterback, well, mostly cause of that. The Eagles defense was middle of the road at best last season, and you can’t deny the Rodgers to Driver & Rodgers to Jennings connections. Driver can still smoke the safeties. Kolb gets his first official start as starter for the Eagles after wallowing in McNabb’s big ass shadow. The Green Bay defense is going to welcome him to the big leagues with plenty of pressure. I’m taking the Packers to upset.

49′ers at Seahawks Line: -3.0
The soon to be Santa Clara 49′ers open their season in the rainy north against the Seahawks. The niners, while having an offense with lots of potential, are carrying around too much bad mojo with a constantly angry Mike Singletary and the contract whining of Michael Craptree. Did I spell that right? The Niners are in a bad division, and so are the Seahawks. Hey, it’s the same division! Since their Superbowl loss to the Steelers, the ‘Hawks have completely fallen off the radar of the football nation, nearly making a run at the playoffs last year, but sucking just enough not to. I’m taking the ‘Hawks at home, but ignoring the points.

Cowboys at Redskins Line: +3.5
McNabb continues his rivalry against Tony Romo and the Cowboys, except, without the rest of the Eagles. He gets his first start as the newest sucker to line up behind center for the Redskins. Good luck McNabb. That offensive line couldn’t protect a bag of sugar from a line of ants. Which is hard anyway, unless you put the sugar in a ziploc bag. Miles Austin will be the stand out receiver of the NFC this year, unless Romo has more trouble in his love life. For this contest however, I’m taking the Cowboys easy. If the Redskins aren’t a joke this year, I’ll be surprised.

Ravens at Jets Line: -2.5 !!DEFENSIVE SMACKDOWN OF THE WEEK!!
Oh yeah, this game is going to be awesome. I really hope CBS (who carries the AFC match-ups) shows this one in every market. Wait, what? It’s on Monday Night Football? Even better. This is the perfect Monday night game. Strong defense on both sides, the Jets featuring a secondary that is quick and ruthless, the Ravens with a front line that can’t be beat. Forget about Flacco, forget about Sanchez, this game is all about defense. Since I have to pick, I’m taking the Jets at home with the points, just cause they are favoring the bettor.

Chargers at Chiefs Line: +4.5
Philip Rivers knows what it takes to win. Matt Cassel knows what it takes to watch Tom Brady win. Cassel gets a chance to show that he’s not just a super back-up, but a super starter. Sadly, the Chiefs aren’t what they ever are, which is not much of anything. Not in my football watching lifetime at least. The Chargers will be picking apart the Chiefs defense like it’s lice in a middle school classroom. I’m not sure that made any sense. I’m taking the Chargers to win this one easy, though if I had to pick an upset special part two, this would probably be it.

That’s it. Agree? Disagree? Leave it in the comments. Stay tuned for Week Two next week, which makes perfect sense.

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NFL Preview: NFC Predictions

Monday, September 6th, 2010
Dance Party!

Will Favre & the Vikings be dancing their way into the playoffs?

Last week we took a look at the AFC in preparation for the upcoming season, this week I took a couple minutes out of my day contemplating which college football games to watch to make some equally wild NFC predictions. Yes, I am aware the win/loss math might not add up, but you get the picture. Frankly, I could have fixed it but I was having problems opening Excel, nah, that’s a lie. Just lazy is all. Anyway, here are my NFC predictions for 2010. Enjoy.

NFC North

Chicago Bears Last Season: 7-9 I will hereby refer to the Bears at the Bucs of the North. Because they too, will suck. Really, this is all it took for me to see that this team does not have it’s shit straight. Coach Lovie Smith says Devin Hester won’t return kickoffs. Are you kidding? The one highlight on this formerly great franchise isn’t being allowed to do what he does best. Hester makes a mediocre receiver at best, but a game changing and dynamic kick returner. Now, Smith could be just trying to not show his hand on this, but we’ll find out week one I suppose. With Hester returning kicks, the Bears could be unpredictably good. Without? Boring and unispired. Predicted Finish: 8-8

Green Bay Packers Last Season: 11-5 Aaron Rodgers came out from under the shadown of Favre and it was good. Even though they bit it in the playoffs last year, the Packers had a lot going for them on offense and the defense just keeps getting better. Rodgers will be the caliber quarterback that he looks like, even with the beard. The Packers will go deep into the playoffs this year and I’m actually predicting them to go all the way to the Superbowl. Predicted Finish: 14-2

Minnesota Vikings Last Season: 12-4 Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. Favre. And they’ll lose twice to the Packers. Predicted Finish: 12-4

Detroit Lions Last Season: 2-14 Two words. Ndamukong Suh. The Lions have had the worst defense in the league for three straight years. Perhaps Suh can change that. Stafford is looking like a real live NFL quarterback. However, this is still the Detroit Lions and they have a perrineal habit of losing. Ah, what the hell, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt and say Suh gives them an extra win just from bostlering the defense just a little bit. Predicted Finish: 3-13

NFC East

New York Giants Last Season: 8-8 Tom Coughlin needs to go. Since his Superbowl win, he’s slowly been losing control of the team. It’s this odd thing, but the Giants constantly seem stressed out. Eli Manning doesn’t have the composure that his older brother has, it seems like he’s always frustrated at his offensive line or at the slumping defensive line. The success of this team rests on how well they do in the division, as it does for all of the East. With McNabb still around, the Cowboys offense and well, the Eagles existing, this could be a rough year for the Giants. Predicted Finish: 7-9

Dallas Cowboys Last Season: 11-5 This is a tought team to call. Wade Phillips is a good coordinator, but he tends to fall apart in the playoffs. I know he’s the head coach, but still. Whiner Patrick Crayton is gone, thankfully, which means that Miles Austin will be the star receiver in Dallas. The Romo to Austin connection will be frequent, but not as frequent as that Romo to Whitten connection. The real question with the Cowboys is once they get to the playoffs, can they keep their shit together? I think this is going to be an exciting team to watch this year, but fans could be setting themselves up for another letdown. Especially in this division, which tends to be tough on itself. Predicted Finish: 12-4

Philadephia Eagles Last Season: 11-5 Hey, it’s Kevin Kolb! The Eagles were the Cowboys bitch last year, losing a record three times to Dallas. How in the hell this team made the playoffs I have no idea. Oh yeah, with the running of McNabb and Westbrook. While McNabb will be scrambling on almost every play in Washington, Westbrook is no longer part of the Eagles franchise. Could Andy Reid not see past the lunch buffet to realize that this team needs the strong ground attack skills of both McNabb and Westbrook? Kolb is a drop back passer, that puts a lot more pressure on the offensive line that caused McNabb to run for his life so many times. Hey, at least they have Michael Vick. Predicted Finish: 8-8

Washington Redskins Last Season: 4-12 I’d like to start with a quote from my 2004 pre-season preview, “As long as Snyder is in the house, the Skins’ will not see the playoffs except for on television.” I still hold this statement to be true, no matter how good this team might look on paper, no matter how many upsets they can pull off against Dallas, with Snyder running the show they will be a terrible franchise. Constant coach turnover, constant coordinator turnover, I’m surprised McNabb signed there. Donovan McNabb will have to play his former team twice this year, and he’ll be lucky if they can carry him away from those games in one piece. Another player fighting retirement, McNabb is in for a rude awakening. Welcome to the land of no pocket protection Donovan. Predicted Finish: 3-13

NFC South

Tampa Bay Buccaneers Last Season: 3-13 There isn’t much to say about the Suckaneers, as they are affectionatly referred to in my home area of Tampa Bay. Since their Superbowl run this team has steadily declined, losing Monte Kiffen in the middle of the season was the last crack in their already fragile spine. Two young quarterbacks, an even younger coach and highly questionable running backs and wide receivers. I’m sure Kellen Winslow is loving his decision now. That was sarcasm. The Bucs suck and will suck. The only reason I’m giving them four wins is because they play the Browns. Predicted Finish: 4-12

Carolina Panthers Last Season: 8-8 Any Cats fans out there? No? Finally ditching Delhomme for Matt Moore seemed to be a good call last year for the Panthers. Picking up Clausen in the draft was also a good call because after all, this is the NFC south. Collar bones will be broken. The strong point with this team has always been their ground attack, expect more of the same this year. I’m talking to you defensive coordinators out there. The NFC South plays the AFC North this year in cross conference play, so this should be interesting because all three AFC North teams have strong run defenses (save for the Browns, who suck.) I don’t see the Panthers overcoming the defenses they’ll be up against to do better than last year. Predicted Finish: 8-8

New Orleans Saints Last Season: 13-3 I would love to say that Drew Brees and the high flying Saints offense will be back on top this year, headed straight back to the Superbowl. I think they playoffs are in their future, but knowing what we know – that’s a stretch. So what is it that we know? Well, Drew Brees graced the cover of Madden 11. We all know about the Madden curse? Right? Yeah, I know that’s some serious voodoo, but Brees is doomed. Aside from all that, the offense hasn’t changed much since last year, so the playoffs should be a lock as long as Brees can fight the curse. Predicted Finish: 12-4

Atlanta Falcons Last Season: 9-7 The Falcons are no longer a team to be ignored. Finishing the season by beating the Jets, the addition of Michael Turner last year seemed to help the ground game. Matt Ryan is on his way to becoming a great quarterback. However, this is a tough division to be in this year, as the other teams are heavy on the defensive end of things and Atlanta’s defense, not looking too fantastic. However, the only offensive minded team they have to worry about is the Saints, and we already know why they are doomed. Predicted Finish: 12-4

NFC West

Seattle Seahawks Last Season: 5-11 Am I the only one that thinks Matt Hasselbeck is just looking tired? Tired of playing for a team that lost to the Steelers in the Superbowl and hasn’t seemed to recover? Tired of playing in the rain, tired of throwing interceptions and just plain tired. How is this guy still playing? Is he on Zoloft or something? And now stuck with Pete Carroll hopping off the USC train to go back and take another shot at the NFL? And dealing with the loss of T.J. Houshmanzada? Ouch. Too many questions with this team, I predict doom. Predicted Finish: 6-10

San Francisco 49′ers Last Season: 8-8 Mike Singletary didn’t do half bad last year. A lot of times ex-players as coaches tend to bomb. However, Singletary didn’t take crap from anyone and pushed his team to perform. Frank Gore is damn fun to watch and Alex Smith looked like a bonafide NFL Quarterback. Sadly, there was one player Singletary rolled over for, Michael Crabtree. Without Crabtree, before giving into his ridiculous salary demands, the Niners were 8-5. After signing Crabtree, 5-7. Bad mojo abounds. Thankfully, being in the single worst division in football kind of helps. Predicted Finish: 9-7

Arizona Cardinals Last Season: 10-6 Matt Leinart will finally be getting the start over the now retired Kurt Warner. Wait, the Cardinals dumped Leinart? Really? Ok, so Derek Andersen will get the start after being shedded like dead skin from the Browns roster. Gone from the Cardinals are Antrel Rolle, Karlos Dansby and Anquan Boldin. Ken Whisenhunt is still there though, and he’s managed to turn this franchise around from the laughing stock they used to be. It all comes down to quarterback protection and clock management, something the Cardinals struggled with in the playoffs last year. If not for being in the worst division currently in football, playoffs wouldn’t be in their future. Predicted Finish: 11-5

St. Louis Rams Last Season: 1-15 Who cares? Sam Bradford cries himself to sleep every night. Predicted Finish: 2-14

So, if you missed it, my rundown for the playoffs:

NFC North: Packers
NFC East: Cowboys
NFC West: Cardinals
NFC South: Falcons
Wild Cards: Vikings, Saints

Stay tuned on Thursday for NFL Week One Predictions!

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