Posts About ‘Manning’

Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Superbowl XLVI

Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

What a pretty trophy.

Welcome to the big game. I’m here in Indianapolis, hanging out on Media Day and trying to find a path through the crowd so I can touch Mel Kiper’s hair. I don’t understand why they let all these fans in. All they are doing is stinking up the joint with their handfuls of nachos and sweat stained Peyton Manning jerseys. There are no Giants or Patriots fans here. I spoke to one of the volunteers, he said that they’ll be flying in several thousand corporate ticket holders, like a ton of people from Doritos, slap some jerseys on them and hope they cheer at the right time. That’s fucked up. There will be no true fans in the building.

I spent a few minutes out in the parking lot with the true fans, guys wearing meatball stained Brady jerseys who drove all the way from the armpits of Boston. They are grilling, drunk at 8am on a Tuesday and they won’t get in the game. A lot of them will go home with citations and injuries. There is a surprising amount of sex going on, considering the weather and how most of the fans are quite overweight. I don’t talk to anyone about how most of the seats are going to be taken up by corporate sponsors, media & all the players baby mamas. There is a whole numbered section reserved just for women that Ochocinco has knocked up. What I do talk to them about is who they think is going to win and why, but honestly they were too drunk and belligerent to get any straight answers beyond “Giants rule!” or “Patriots Rule!” So I went back inside, hoping to sneak into the cheerleaders locker room.

Instead of naked cheerleaders, I spent some time at the brunch buffet with Archie Manning. I asked him if he was proud of his boys. In between bites of a biscuit smothered in turkey gravy, he said that he was proud of both of them, but wished that they hadn’t followed in his footsteps. I asked him why and he told me that he worries they’ll both end up injured for life, and no matter how much money they have it’s not going to matter, they’ll be broken. The game is much rougher now, he said, back in the day you worried about injury but the defense seems out to hurt. He then offered me a slice of ham also smothered in turkey gravy. As I ate the ham, I noticed Merril Hoge out of the corner of my eye.

It took me a couple minutes to get Merril’s attention, as every mirror or reflective surface (including camera lenses) he had to adjust his giant windsor knot. It was like it was stuffed with cotton. Finally I cornered him and was able to ask about his achilles heel this season, Tim Tebow. Merril was quick to point out what a Tebow honk I’ve been this season and I explained it was because I had faith in the guy. He had magic. Merril said that magic is fake and while he might have been wrong on paper, he still feels Tebow will be a bust in the NFL. I decided to drop it and ask who he thought would win the Superbowl. Not Tim Tebow he said, and walked away.

I decided to play the next hour or so fast and loose, so I followed Kelly Clarkson around, counting how many bags of travel size Lays chips she went through. For a fat chick, she smells a lot like an old lady. I guess I should have been surprised by how many linemen she tried to blow, but not surprised that she propositioned them with a mouthful of chips. When her security guy noticed I was trailing her around the stadium he chased me off with a cattle prod. I ended up hiding in Madonna’s dressing room, which was full of dead baby fetuses. Apparently the stem cells were the only thing keeping her alive. Man, that halftime show is gonna suck balls.

New York Giants at New England Patriots

February 5, 2012, 6:29 PM ET
Line: -3.0 55.0 O/U

Flashback: Superbowl XLII – after losing in their last game of the season to the Patriots 38-35 the Giants beat the Patriots in the Superbowl by a final score of 17-14. The Patriots finished the season 18-1 overall, while the Giants became the first NFC Wild-Card team to win a Superbowl. It was a major upset, and plenty of history was made as Eli Manning exceeded expectations and led a last minute, 4th quarter drive highlighted by an amazing “pinned to the helmet” catch by David Tyree. The Patriots, seemingly defeated had 35 seconds to respond, and were stopped cold by the stronger Giants defense.

Offensive/Defensive Breakdown (Giants O v. Patriots D): The Giants are a ground and pound team, with an occasional emphasis on the deep pass. Manning has got the receivers to make this happen and while he hasn’t relied as much on his tight ends as other teams, they are available to pick up outlet passes. The Giants ran, ran, ran against the Niners, who had the best run defense in the league. It paid off, as they didn’t pick up a ton of yards but ground out the game and were able to control the tempo. Manning has shades of Peyton when it comes to making adjustments, just with less wild body language. The Giants should have a smooth day on offense, as the Patriots defense, while stepping their game up and looking good against a limited Ravens offense, are still lagging in many areas, such as run defense. The Patriots defense is going to have no choice but to stack the box with five if they want to stop the run. Of course this will pull one man out of coverage, which Manning can easily exploit. The Giants will win this battle of offense v. defense. The only question is whether the Patriots can score more points.

How to Ruin a Classic: What is more appealing about the Superbowl? The game itself or the commercials? At a whopping $3.5mm for a 30 second spot, the commercials better not disappoint. Of course we’ll have a full slate of Budweiser commercials, Coke Polar Bears, Doritos causing people to act like idiots and probably that white trash Pepsi guy pretending he’s a coach. But we’ll also have a lot of car commercials, most of which will come off as douchey and pretentious. Like the ad from Honda for their CRV. In it, they (along with the vapid participation of Matthew Broderick) destroy a classic and save us the trouble of being pissed off during the game.

Many people enjoyed that ad, many people did not. Really, it doesn’t matter. It’s a fucking commercial. The larger point is this, many ads are being shown before the game. Many people watch the game for the ads (because they are mindless fucking Americans) – meh, who am I kidding? It won’t matter. It’ll still be the highest rated television program of the year, in the world, on every channel. Yearggh Football!! Screw you soccer!

Offensive/Defensive Breakdown (Patriots O v. Giants D): The Patriots have one of the most unpredictable, explosive offenses in the league. Most of it comes down to play calling and Bellichick’s ability to recognize defensive tendencies and make in-game adjustments, something many other coaches fail to do on both sides of the ball. His biggest accomplishment this year was handing TE Gronkowski with precision. When not lined up to block, he could be handling business as a receiver, or as a running back. Using Hernandez on the end around while Gronk was being double teamed was genius. Pulling Gronk back to the traditional TE set to throw off a defense that was looking for him as a wide receiver, also genius. The thing is though, that the Patriots offense is all about timing. The Ravens showed that if you disrupt their timing and get after Brady, you can hold their scoring down. The Giants have probably the best front four in the league and will certainly mess up Brady’s rhythm. Having a good front four who can apply pressure without the blitz is important, because that leaves more in coverage to handle the receivers, in this case, two very proficient tight ends.

Final Analysis: The difference between the Giants and the Ravens is that the Giants can score. Even if the Patriots defense steps up, the Giants offense is much more explosive than the Ravens offense. The Patriots defense won’t stack up in the end. While high scoring, the game against the Ravens showed that the Pats offense can be held down and smothered, which is what the Giants are going to do. I’m looking for the Giants to come out running, and to come out pushing hard on Brady. Bottom line, defense wins championships. And yes, the Patriots have a bottom ranked defense and beat the Ravens, but the Patriots defense did not play like a bottom ranked defense in that game. They played like a top ranked one. It won’t matter. The Patriots have been good this year, but have struggled against teams with a winning record, and beating the lethargic offense of the Ravens and the strange one of the Broncos won’t prepare them to face the Giants again. I’ve got the Giants winning this one, final score 27-24.

Next week: Nothing. The Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game will return in August with the NFC/AFC predictions. There might be a draft day column, but don’t hold your breath.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Pro Bowl = Lame

Thursday, January 26th, 2012

The pro bowl, who cares?

I always have trouble filling this space in the week before the Superbowl. Recently though, the NFL moved the Pro Bowl from the week after the Superbowl (where no one gave a shit about it) to the week before the Superbowl (where no one gives a shit about it). First off, the Pro Bowl selections are made before the season is even over. What the fuck is up with that? The best players haven’t even had a full season to shine? That just proves that it’s nothing more than a bullshit popularity contest. Then, consider that many players that deserve to be in the Pro Bowl aren’t, because they are playing the Superbowl. Which is where they’d rather be anyway.

So of course I have no picks this week, because the Pro Bowl is a waste of time and I don’t think I’ve watched it in about 10 years. Instead, I’m going to repost some text from the middle of the offseason where I ranked the All-Star games among all major sports. I think that Hockey has gone back to the regular format for All-Stars, rather than team captains, but the ranking hasn’t changed. Actually, I have no idea. First though, I’ll run down my pre-season playoff picks and see if I got any right.

Preseason Playoff Picks

NFC

Cowboys (division win)
Packers (division win, Superbowl)
Lions (wild-card)
Bucs (wild-card)
Falcons (division win)
Rams, Cardinals, Seahawks, Niners (division win – couldn’t decide)

AFC

Steelers (division win)
Ravens (wild-card)
Colts (division win – assuming Peyton was playing)
Texans (wild-card)
Patriots (division win, Superbowl)
Chiefs (division win)

So let’s see, I was right about the Lions, Falcons, Packers, Ravens, Steelers, Texans and Patriots making the playoffs. However, only the Patriots have been my most reliable pre-season pick, yet I picked against them last week like an idiot. Whatever.

Ranking the All-Star Shenanigans

Originally posted July 2011 and I was too lazy to change the specific detail pertaining to last years dates, so deal.

#5 The NFL Pro-Bowl

This game went from being a joke, to an absolute joke. Not only do most of the players complain about going, but it’s like watching a game of touch football. Understandably, no one wants to get hurt in the last game of the season, and most of them just want to get their short vacations started. Even though now we’re seeing them experience an extended vacation. The NFL thought they solved this issue by moving the Pro-Bowl from the week after the Superbowl to the week before the Superbowl in Miami. This was a terrible idea, as now the best players in the league (you know, the ones in the Superbowl) can’t even be recognized as all-stars because they can’t play in the game. For those two reasons, the quality of play and the lack of players, this is my worst rated All-Star game. Add on the fact that the television coverage is basically second rate, the Pro-Bowl blows ass.

#4 MLB All-Star Game

Now, don’t get me wrong – I love the build-up to this game. Specifically the homerun derby, especially since they started letting players pick their hitters. This is a fun time and seems like the players truly enjoy hanging out and slamming free homeruns. Plus, a lot of charity is involved in the derby, so that’s a good thing too. It’s also a lot more entertaining to watch than the game the next day. Now, not everyone agrees with me that the MLB All-Star game is one of the worst, and that’s all well and good but I think for me it’s more the coverage that ruins it for me than the game itself. First off, Fox’s coverage of the game is way too much pomp and circumstance. This year, it was even worse when they led in with ridiculous previews for the X-Factor show. No one watching the game gives a shit. Not to mention, is anyone else just plain tired of Joe Buck?

The game itself isn’t too bad. The teams actually appear like they are trying to win the game. They are a little held back, and usually it comes down to who hits the homeruns. The pitchers are certainly holding back, as an injury on the mound is always in their minds. But what makes it real shit is that it “means something.” You can blame Bud Selig for that, in response to an All-Star game that went 11 innings with no winner, Selig decided that it would be a good idea that the winner of the All-Star game determines home field advantage in the World Series. Are you fucking kidding me? No where does home advantage mean more than in the World Series and it was determined by a meaningless game played by the most popular (because it is a popularity contest, that was assured by letting the fans vote) players and not by record as it should, and is throughout the playoffs. This is a ridiculous end result of the game, and is just plain stupid. I hope, whatever National League team (as the NL All-Stars won this year off a Cecil Fielder homerun) send a thank you note to Fielder for that win. Of course, they could also send fuck you notes to the American League pitchers, who spoon fed him that homerun. Weak.

#3 MLS All-Star Game

I’ve actually never watched a MLS All-Star game. I know that they do it a little different, the best of the U.S. teams vs. a world team like Manchester United. That’s a pretty kick-ass game, because in between dives, they actually play a hard game because it’s based on pride. Sadly, I think the American team loses a lot, but that really doesn’t matter much in the scheme of things. I’ll watch it this year, I promise.

#2 NBA All-Star Game

Like the MLB game, the best part of the NBA All-Star break is the pre-game stuff the day before. The dunk contest highlights everything that is wrong with the NBA, as far as the individualism and so on, but it’s a fucking blast to watch. They jump over cars, shoot 3-pointers and have a blast. The game itself is highly competitive for a game that doesn’t mean anything, this is the general mindset in the NBA though, so that makes sense. It’s probably the only NBA game I watch all year besides the playoffs, as it’s a true All-Star game, with a lot of who-dat players based on stats rather than pure popularity, though there is some of that. In the end though, it’s still the NBA and doesn’t have half as much energy as my number one.

#1 NHL All-Star Game

The NHL game wasn’t always my favorite. For a long while it was East vs. West, which was okay but a bit bland to watch. Then it was USA vs. Canada (or was it World, I can’t remember) but this year they blew me away with their handling of the All-Star game. They went all playground rules on us. First they picked team captains, then they staged a mock draft where the captains picked their teams. The coverage of this took itself a bit too seriously, but it was great that there was no telling who was going to be on which team. This added a level of enjoyment to it because you knew that heated rivals could end up on the same team, and they did. I don’t remember what team won, but I know the score was in the double digits on both sides.

Adding another fun dimension to the game was having the goalies miked up during the game. In between blocking shots, they were bullshitting with the announcers, just having a fun time and performing for the fans. Because in the end, that’s what this game highlighted – the fans. Before the game there was tons of fan interaction, the referees didn’t even call offsides until the 3rd period and were just letting the players play, and the fans enjoy a high scoring exhibition game. Which is what all the All-Star games should be, exhibition games for the fans, to see the best players in the league let loose a little bit so we can look at them as people like us, rather than rich superstars.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Championship Weekend

Thursday, January 19th, 2012

Niners vs. Giants. Should be a new classic.

I’m not going to bore you with mindless statistics and blather. The fact is that last week was a tough week to pick and statistics did not lie. 75% of the home teams won, but not the 75% I picked. By the time the Giants v Packers game started, three home teams had won. So I loudly declared to pretty much one person that the Giants were going to win the game. They did, and the Packers, who had a monumental season all for naught, are done. Now we have four teams left and picking the winners is toughest it’s been all season.

That being said, it is only two games so I have to fill up this space with something. So in personal news, I’ll be in Chicago this week (Friday – Sunday) attending a Kenmore event at their bequest. If you are around, or just on Twitter, come hang out downtown Chicago. CC will be there with me as well, killing some deep dish. On with the picks!

AFC Championship: Baltimore at New England
Sunday, 3:00 PM ET
Line: 50.0 O/U -7.5

This game is the proof – does defense win championships? The Patriots have a bottom ranked defense, yet they sure came alive against the Broncos – but the Broncos defense was also terrible, so there’s that. The Patriots have won games with offense all year long, and I don’t expect that strategy to totally turn around in a week. They are going to come into this game firing and looking to rack up the score against the defensive minded Ravens. It’s not going to happen. The Ravens held the Texans, who in effect – held the Ravens. The Ravens offensive line didn’t perform as well as they should have, but really have nothing to worry about with the weak pass rush of the Patriots. Sure, they managed to fluster Tebow a couple times, but that was a fluke. Most of the time he had all day and then some to throw. The Ravens are going to force the Patriots hand on offense, as their defense will be swarming Brady and throwing off his timing. This is what I said the Broncos needed to do, but failed to do. Everything about the Patriots offense is timing, especially with the routes run by the tight ends. On the offensive side of the ball for the Ravens, they’ll have to tighten up their protection a bit and re-establish the running game, which should be easy against the Patriots poor run defense. Bottom line, the Patriots don’t have the defense to stop the Ravens mediocre offense, and they might have a powerful offense, but defense wins championships. Bottom line. On championship weekend the statistics state that 50% of the home teams win. So in this one, I’m taking the Ravens to overcome and get into the Superbowl, against (obviously) the Niners, and I’ll tell you why in the next paragraph.

NFC Championship: New York at San Francisco
Sunday, 6:30 PM ET
Line: 44.0 O/U -2.0

Everyone loves the Giants in this game, because they can’t believe that the Niners are restoring their franchise to glory. Where Singletary coached with negative enforcement, Harbaugh coaches with positive reinforcement, something that was evident in Vernon Davis’ tears and hug after he scored the winning touchdown last week. That was the Saints game to lose, and they made sure to lose, especially on that last drive when their secondary seemed to forget they were still playing a game and gave the Niners the whole field. So now the Niners welcome the hot and cold Giants to town, who turn it on when they need to. And they needed to last week and they damn sure did. They ran the Packers right off their own field, dominating on offense and on defense. They made it look easy. Part of that might have been the Packers offense not playing up to par with all the drops, but the pressure on Rodgers helped as well. Against the Niners, they are going up against probably the best fundamental defense in the league. Rather than go for the flashy Sportscenter play, the Niners just plain cover and tackle well. They bump receivers at the line to throw off timing, they get the pressure on with their front four, rarely running a crazy eight man blitz and almost always win the turnover game. Their defense will stifle Manning and his receivers, so the Giants will have to rely on their own defense. They might have a slight edge over the Niners offense in that case, but Alex Smith is a legit playmaker, but he gets no love for it. Right now, his report with his receivers is the best it’s ever been. I’m taking the Niners to win at home, and for this game to become a new classic. Harbaugh vs. Harbaugh in the Superbowl. You want to know who I’m going to pick to win that game? You’ll have to wait two weeks.

Next week: Pro Bowl Idiocy and where I went wrong with my pre-season picks.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 17

Thursday, December 29th, 2011

Watch your back Drew, here comes Brady


So I’m thinking of instead of making this a general sports column when the season is over, just turning it into the weekly Tebow report. Just kidding. I’m still fishing for good ideas though, I’m sure that I’ll think of something. Speaking about Tebow though, was Jesus on vacation on his birthday weekend or something? Four interceptions? Nah, it was because for some reason Fox dropped the read option after the first quarter which allowed the Bills excellent corners to drop back and make it easy to intercept Tebow. Of course, there were also some more drops by the Denver receivers… what am I doing? Moving on.

This week is all divisional and while some playoff teams have little to gain by winning, and some teams have nothing to lose, some teams are still fighting for a playoff spot. Now, no team WANTS to lose – ever. That’s proven by the 0-13 Colts now at 2-13 and most likely losing dibs on the first round first pick. The AFC West and NFC East are still undecided and up to four teams are in the running for the last wild card in the AFC. It’s a race to the finish in Week 17. Next week we’ll look at the playoffs, and take a look back at my season start predictions to see how wrong, or right, I was.

For this week though, sixteen games between now and the playoffs. There is no crapfest this week, there is no featured game, there is no upset special. Too many games have playoff implications and I totally forgot to make those selections before I wrote this lede. So there’s that. Alright, enough, how about some picks?

Detroit at Green Bay Line: +3.5
Detroit is in. Green Bay is in. Neither of these teams have anything to play for so I guarantee you that they’ll be resting starters. It’ll be like a preseason game. And if I was Green Bay, I wouldn’t play Rodgers at all for risk of injury against a notoriously violent and highly penalized Detroit team. They can’t risk that at all, and I’m not saying they’ll intentionally be gunning for Rodgers, but they will. Either way, the defense won’t be resting much. Packers to win at home on their way to a two week break before the divisional match-ups.

San Francisco at St. Louis Line: +10.5
The Niners have not yet sealed up a first round bye advantage in the playoffs, a win here and a New Orleans loss would do that, I think. I’m not sure who would hold the tiebreaker here. Either way, the Niners don’t even have to put an offense on the field to win against the Rams, they can just play straight defense and the Rams terrible offense should give up the ball enough for the Niners to score. I think that line is a bit generous, but Niners to win on the road.

NY Jets at Miami Line: -1.0
I’m really looking forward to this game. After losing to the Giants, Rex Ryan still had the audacity to pick a verbal fight with Brandon Jacobs, then still predict his team would make the playoffs and win the Superbowl. He’s out of his fucking mind. I’m looking for the Dolphins to put the Jets out of their misery and push them out of playoff contention. This is going to be a good back and forth game, with big plays being made on the defensive side of the ball. Look for Miami to jump the Jets and smack them down. Miami to win at home.

Chicago at Minnesota Line: -0.0
The Bears season has turned into quite a farce, while the Vikings season was one to begin with. Now, with Adrian Peterson out with a torn ACL and MCL, their future is in question. No doubt they’ll be drafting a running back high in the draft. Meanwhile, the Bears have not won since Cutler went down and we can all blame Martz for that. Martz should be fired at the end of the year for his inability to adapt to a new quarterback and inability to switch up the offense. He’s a great coordinator, but he messed up here letting his ego get in the way of running the offense based on the skills of the QB. The Vikings will win this week, just cause of Webb being able to run around like a mad chicken. Vikings at home.

Buffalo at New England Line: -11.5
The Patriots have sealed up everything playoff related besides home field advantage. They don’t need to win, but they need Baltimore to lose in that case. But let’s be honest here. Brady is 190 passing yards behind Drew Brees for the passing record, and while he’ll be hard pressed to surpass him, you know damn well that Bellichick will keep him in the game as long as possible to beat Brees to get the record at the end of the season. The Bills, while looking impressive against Denver, are not that great of a team sadly. They had a lot of potential, so what happened? I have no idea really, besides the new contract for Fitz. So, Patriots to win at home.

Carolina at New Orleans Line: -9.0
Same deal as the Niners game here, with a little twist. The Saints are looking for a first round bye and they need to win to do that. Also, Brees has surpassed Marino for the passing record, and I expect him to play nearly a full game here to put a bit of padding into that record. Plus, Payton is the type of coach that would keep his starters in the game, risking injury to pad that record, since he’d be the coach of record when that record was set. The Panthers have had a positive season. First off, Cam Newton is a superstar, and he set the record for most rushing TD’s by a QB. Second, they didn’t finish last. They will be finishing ahead of the Buccaneers, which is positive. However, Saints to win at home.

Washington at Philadelphia Line: -9.5
Since it’s impossible that both the Giants and Cowboys will lose this week (they play each other) the Eagles won’t be making the playoffs. Thank Odin. However, they did throw a wrench into things last week with their win over the Cowboys. So now they get to finish the season at home against the Redskins, a team that once again failed to find an identity and didn’t amount to anything. The Eagles are going to finish 8-8, but considering the talent on this team, and the money spent that’s like the Yankees finishing dead last behind the Orioles. Eagles fans have got to be disappointed. Is it worth firing Andy Reid over? No. Unless he does it again next year. Eagles at home.

Indianapolis at Jacksonville Line: -3.5
The Colts, with two wins have only this game to lose before getting beat to the number one pick in the draft. Can they do it? Can they lose on the road to the Jaguars? Like I said, no team wants to lose, and Orlofsky certainly doesn’t want to lose, as he’s now won two straight. Last week’s win against the Texans was epic and a great thing to add to his resume if he wants a starting job somewhere next year. I’m sure KC, Arizona and a few others will be looking. So the Jags only bright spot this season has been the running of Maurice Jones-Drew. Gabbart was horrendous to watch, the kid was just not ready. Hopefully he gets a veteran to study under before getting another shot. Anyway, I’m taking the Colts to win, which should make the draft interesting. Will they trade up for Luck? Colts on the road.

Tennessee at Houston Line: +1.5
Houston has a hard road ahead of them, thanks to some less than stellar play since they clinched the playoffs. A couple of losses later, and now they are going in without a bye or home-field advantage. Hopefully Wade Phillips is back this week because some of the defensive decisions the past two weeks were terrible and they’ll need him for the playoffs. They can take a loss here and nothing will change. Except for their record. They made the playoffs for the first time in team history, let’s finish on a high note. Of course, they don’t have any back-ups sitting around in case Yates gets hurt. The Titans season has been forgettable to say the least. Chris Johnson took 2/3 of the season to apparently bathe in his millions of dollars due to the new contract before he decided to start earning it. I think the lack of an offseason really hurt the offensive line of the Titans. However, a Titans win with Denver, Oakland and Jets losing does mean playoffs – so there’s that. Cross your fingers Titans fans, it’s gonna be interesting. Titans to win.

Tampa Bay at Atlanta Line: -12.0
The Bucs are a joke this year, which is sad because as a non-Bucs fan living in Tampa I actually picked them to go to the playoffs. Whatever. The Falcons are pissed cause Brees stayed in the game last week, which sounds like hapless whining to me and should piss off the Football Gods. If you can’t beat the Saints now what makes us think you can beat anyone in the first round of the playoffs? Atlanta is in and really can’t improve their position so they’ll be resting starters. Doesn’t matter, the Bucs have given up for sure. Falcons to win at home.

Baltimore at Cincinnati Line: +3.0
The Ravens and Steelers are tied atop the division right now, winner gets the division and they both are already going to the playoffs. Clearly, this scenario favors the Steelers as they have the Browns, whereas the Ravens have the Bengals, who they’ve already beaten once this year. The Bengals, so close to being dominant were unable to beat the Ravens or the Steelers this year and need a win here to get into the playoffs. Well, a loss might do it – but everyone else would have to lose too. Sadly, I don’t think that the Bengals will be able to beat the Ravens this year. They just aren’t there yet. The defensive pressure is too much for Dalton at this point. He does tend to make good decisions when under pressure, so that helps. But I’m taking the Ravens to win. The AFC Wild-Card is still up for grabs.

Pittsburgh at Cleveland Line: -0.0
I looked twice, that line seemed to be for real. Even though the Steelers absolutely have to win to get the division and not a wild-card spot. Even with a Ravens loss and a Steelers loss, the Ravens hold the tiebreaker over the Steelers since they beat them twice this year. The Browns have had a disappointing season to say the least, always finding a way to lose late in the game rather than a way to win. They blew their chance against the Ravens last week when they were drawn offsides on a 4th and 2 with two minutes left in the game, essentially handing the Ravens the win. Pathetic. I’m not counting them out against the Steelers, I just can’t pick them. Ah hell, Browns to magically win at home, but just cause Ben will probably still be out or at least only take half the snaps.

Kansas City at Denver Line: -3.5
Like I said in the open, the clocks stopped on Tebow Time last week. For some reason Fox abandoned the read option midway through the game and let the Bills defensive backs settle into their own read option, reading where Tebow was being forced to throw the ball. So the Chiefs come into town, and look at that – it’s Kyle Orton, formerly traded from the the Bears to the Broncos then waived earlier this year in favor of Tebow. Will Orton get his revenge on the team that cast him out and cast them out of the playoffs? A Denver loss and Oakland win will do just that. The only chance Denver has is to win. The Chiefs are going to make that tough, but I think the Broncos get a lead early and keep it. Broncos at home.

San Diego at Oakland Line: -3.0
The Chargers, who took a serious beating last week at the hands of the Lions, look to finish their season on a high note by playing spoiler for the Raiders. The Raiders need to win and hope the Broncos lose in order to make the playoffs, which is a tough scenario for a team that had so much promise in the first half of the season. Plagued by injuries and penalties they were unable to overcome but still have a chance. Last week one of the things I guaranteed happens in December didn’t happen, well, neither of them happened, but relevant to this – Rivers lost. Do I think he loses again in the month of December? Nope. Because football is on Sunday, which is the 1st of January. I’m taking the Chargers to win and send the Broncos to the playoffs.

Seattle at Arizona Line: -3.0
The Cardinals season fell short, the Seahawks season fell short. I guess 7-9 wasn’t going to do it this year (as it did last year.) So now both these teams are out and this game is just for shits and giggles. It is the difference between a losing and winning season though, so they’ll be out there, playing hard or whatever. Who cares? I can’t find myself every caring about these teams. Um, Seahawks to win.

Dallas at NY Giants Line: -2.5
This game is awesome. I love that it’s the last game of the season, I love that neither of these half ass teams have made the playoffs yet and it comes down to this. I love that Romo has a hurt hand. I love that Eli can look amazing one week, then throw four interceptions the next. I love that the Eagles dominated both these teams yet will not win the division or get into the playoffs. Two weeks ago (I think) I predicted that the Giants would beat the Cowboys in Dallas (they did) and the Cowboys will win in New York. So, Cowboys to win.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 14

Thursday, December 8th, 2011

Doesn't matter who wins. They'll lose to the Packers anyway.

Only four weeks left in the NFL season. The first of many tears has already started to fall from my baby blue eyes. Not just because the NFL is going to be done soon, but because I have to put up with constant NBA highlights. I was really hoping that the NBA would not be coming back, but it is. At least there is hockey and baseball starts in April. I’m thinking too far ahead. For now, we still have four weeks of the regular season and the playoffs to get through. Which means I have a column of picks to write.

Last week I didn’t do fabulous, but it was a positive week. I’m 63% on the season, which is pretty good but not as good as I want. Time to buck up and really think about these picks. Or not think about these picks. I doubt all the people at work who do better than me on their picks every other week really do much analysis. Maybe I over analyze. I have no idea. That takes too much thought to determine if I’m applying too much thought.

In more personal news, I’m currently looking for strong freelance or even part-time(ish) for hire gigs. Writing, editing, content producing, whatever. So you have a need or know someone who does, please have them contact me. That was a link. Directly to email. That’s how I roll. I’m open to anything, anywhere, any bat channel, any bat time. Enough of that, on with the picks!

Featured Game

New York at Dallas Line: -3.5
The 6-6 Giants roll in to face the 7-5 Cowboys in their first meeting this season (can you believe that?) The table for this dinner isn’t set yet, since they still have to play again in week 17. Basically it’s like this, the winner of this series is the one that makes the playoffs from this division. I’m guessing both of these teams finish 10-6. Which means what for this prediction? It means that the Giants win this week and Dallas wins the next match-up in New York? I guess that’s what it means. Which means divisional record is the tie breaker. At the beginning of the season I picked the Cowboys to win the division, and I’m sticking with that. However, I think they way the Giants played against the Packers and all season is much more impressive than the Cowboys. To this point, and this week – the Giants win. Needless to say, I’ll probably be picking the Cowboys in week 17. Giants on the road by a field goal or less.

 

Tailgate City (The Rest)

Cleveland at Pittsburgh Line: -14.0
For some reason I picked Cleveland last week. As a lifelong Browns fan I should have known better that even at home, they weren’t going to beat their former incarnation in the Ravens. Instead, they got pistol whipped like they were wandering the streets of Cincinnati. The Ravens worked them in every aspect of the game, there were no bright points. It was sad. It’ll be even sadder this week as they visit Pittsburgh. Traditionally, the Steeler vs. Browns match-up is a good game, but there is so much disparity between these two teams over the last couple years that there is no doubt that the Steelers will dominate the Browns. After watching the Steelers run, pass and score at will against the Bengals last week, the Browns don’t stand a chance. Steelers at home.

Houston at Cincinnati Line: -1.0
The Texans are continuously overcoming serious injuries to keep in the game for the playoffs. They have the Titans to watch for, at only two games behind, but they are playing pretty well considering. Yates isn’t terrible and held it together after Johnson was sidelined again this season. The victory over the Falcons was a win for the defense as well, missing Mario Williams. In a year this defense (overall) went from 30th to second. Good job Wade Phillips. The Bengals, while still looking average on both sides of the ball, couldn’t get past the true division test in the Steelers and Ravens. They’ll miss the playoffs. But the Dalton to Green connection is getting exciting to watch. I’m down with that for the future. I think Houston rolls in this week and pulls off a mild upset to secure their spot in the playoffs. Houston on the road.

Minnesota at Detroit Line: -0.0
The downfall of the Lions has almost been as exciting to watch as their surprise start to the season. Schwartz doesn’t seem to care that his team (even without Suh) is committing penalty after penalty, a lot of them in the area of personal fouls. Morons. Their drubbing by the Saints knocked them off the shelf of elite teams for good this season. They really can’t turn it around. The Saints showed that simple double coverage on Megatron really mucks up the offense. Minnesota has a competent defense and I think they can do the same. Losing last week to the Denver Tebows was tough, but the offense turned the ball over at some crucial moments. This should be an interesting game, and I think that if Detroit keeps up it’s penalty ridden ways, the Vikings win this game. Otherwise the Lions win. Do I have to pick a winner with a zero line? Fine. Detroit at home.

New Orleans at Tennessee Line: +4.0
The Titans aren’t out the playoff hunt yet, but they are hoping they continue to be underestimated. Now that CJ2K is finally finding the holes to punch through, they have stepped up their game a notch. 153 yards and two TD’s against Buffalo, and a week before also racking up huge yards it’s undeniable that Johnson is back. Hasselbeck is playing better, finding targets but still managing to throw it to the defense every once in a while. Finding those holes against the Saints defense might prove to be difficult, and they’ll need to if they hope to keep up with the offense. I’m taking the Saints in this game just cause they are the much better team, but I expect the Titans to make it interesting.

Philadelphia at Miami Line: -3.0
Aside from the Lions the other most exciting collapse to watch is that of the Eagles. McCoy is having a great season on the ground, but it doesn’t matter. Vince Young throws interception after interception and Vick can never get the game moving like he promised. It’s a disaster in Philly. Will Andy Reid be out of a job at the end of the season even considering his winning history with the team? Vick was a mistake. Meanwhile, Matt Moore, previously undrafted, will have every right to ask for a nice new contract at the end of the season, regardless of the coach. Assuming he keeps winning. They could finish 8-8, which considering their start would be great for the Dolphins. Reggie Bush has found new life in Miami and I think the Philly defense doesn’t put the brakes on the Dolphins winning ways. Fins to win at home.

Kansas City at NY Jets Line: -9.0
A 38 yard hail mary mixed in with terrible offense, terrible defense and a non-existent running game created a win. An improbable win, but a win and a loss for the Bears. The Chiefs are treading water, with no chance at a winning season and just a sad, sad year. The Jets shouldn’t have a problem with the visiting team this week, since unlike the Bears their team is more than just two guys. Of course, the Jets are the kings of week to week inconsistency on defense and offense, but if even one of those sides sparks just a bit, the win should come easy. Jets to win at home.

New England at Washington Line: +9.0
The difference between the Packers defense and the Patriots defense is turnover margin. While both allow a good chunk of scoring, the Packers defense forces a lot of turnovers that result, either directly or indirectly (in the hands of the offense) in points. The Patriots defense is horrid, making the Colts look moderately good in the passing game last week. This is going to cost them in the playoffs, when they have to face teams like the Ravens or Steelers that can easily take advantage of those defensive holes. I think even Washington this week takes advantage and keeps the game close. while they lost their shoes to the Jets, for the first half of the game they looked like they were in it. Obviously, Patriots to win these week, but they don’t make it look easy.

Atlanta at Carolina Line: +3.0
Cam Newton, rookie of the year? That’s the consideration, though wouldn’t the biggest an impact a player could have on a team be winning? He’s doing a little bit of that, but the best that the Panthers can hope for is a third place finish in the division. The future looks bright for this team and if they can beat Atlanta this week, perhaps the immediate future will look real bright. The Falcons lost against Houston with the inability to run against that defense and a late penalty killed the tying drive. The Panthers don’t have that strong of a defense, and while they whipped up on the Bucs last week, that was the Bucs. Look for the Panthers to come out on all cylinders, but the Falcons to prevail late or in overtime. Falcons to win.

Tampa Bay at Jacksonville Line: +1.0 CRAPFEST OF THE WEEK!!
Chance are that wherever you are in the country this game will be blacked out, thank your lucky stars for that. The Jaguars seemed like they could get something together after inexplicably beating the Ravens but never did. Getting whupped by the Chargers on Monday night was just another nail in the coffin for Del Rio. What? Del Rio is already gone? Oh. Yeah. MJD will run all over the Bucs. This is the point in the season where it gets hard to pick game cause the match-ups are either too good, or too shitty to care about. Let’s be analytical here though. The Bucs run defense, as Carolina proved, is shit. That’s the ONE highlight of the Jags. Jags to win at home.

Indianapolis at Baltimore Line: -17.0
For a team that competed with the Patriots, a seventeen point line has got to be an insult right? Well, consider that while the Patriots have shitty pass defense, the Ravens have a superior pass and rush defense. Now that Flacco has finally learned to hand the ball to Ray Rice more often, the Ravens are looking unstoppable. I mean, at for the moment. The playoffs could be another issue altogether. The Colts, in their “suck for luck” campaign have some hope in Dan Orlovsky – just kidding. Remember him from the 0-16 Lions? Yeah, that’s probably some bad karma right there. I’d be surprised if Peyton is even on the Colts staff next year and not working the sideline with his brother as a QB coach or something. Ravens to win.

Chicago at Denver Line: -3.5 UPSET SPECIAL!!
I realize that this isn’t a true upset special, as the line favors the Broncos – but no one else does. Many of us who have man love for Tim Tebow are rooting for the Broncos, but the haters are just waiting for him to fail. If he makes it to the playoffs (and he will) they’ll be biting their lips waiting to see if he blows it. And if he does (he won’t) they’ll accuse him of not being clutch or whatever. The haters (including Elway) will find a way to bring Tebow down. But he won’t have any of it. It’s not about him, and he’s made that clear. Last week it was about him in the second half though, with 202 yards passing and 2 TD’s. He only rushed four times during the game. Surprised? The Bears will be too. John Fox has done an excellent job adjusting the offense to his QB’s strengths, rather than forcing him to learn a new system mid-season. Coach of the year for sure. Meanwhile, Martz as offensive coordinator for the Bears has done a shitty job adjusting anything for the constantly struggling Caleb Hanie. His “west coast” offense is not eay for a rookie to pick up, much less mid-season. Perhaps Cutler comes back this game, perhaps not but with Forte out for the season most likely – the Bears are done. Doesn’t matter, I was going to pick the Broncos no matter what. Broncos at home.

San Francisco at Arizona Line: +4.0
With a month to go in the season, the Niners have already locked up the division, even though technically Arizona and the Seahawks are in the wild-card hunt (is the NFC that bad this year?) That being said, while Arizona pulled off an improbable victory against the Cowboys, attempting to do that against the Niners is going to be a bit more difficult. The Niners defense is tighter than a… I’ll leave that metaphor to your imagination. The Cardinals won by finding the glaring holes in the Cowboys run defense and because Romo sucks. The Niners keep winning on great defense and killer passing from young Alex Smith who is on his way to the NFC Championship game against the Packers. Niners to win.

Oakland at Green Bay Line: -11.5
Meh. The Packers might toy with the Raiders for a little while, letting them score some points. The defense might give up some points, but they can score too. The Raiders have been decimated with injuries and penalties. That ass kicking they took at the hands of the Dolphins also helped them lose their standing in the division. They aren’t out of it yet, but they are this week. The Packers are unstoppable, especially by an inferior team like the Raiders. Should be fun for Palmer, just cause he gets to meet Rodgers, the QB that Palmer could have been had he been just a tad better. Packers to win.

Buffalo at San Diego Line: -7.0
What to say about the Bills? I think the loss of Fred Jackson hurt this team more than previously assumed. Spiller has been carrying the load, and doing alright, but the offense hasn’t been the same. Not to mention the defense suddenly giving up big plays late in the game. Last week against the Titans they gave up tons of yards to CJ2K and while the Chargers don’t have explosive a runner, Tolbert isn’t terrible in the backfield. The question for the Chargers is the consistency, something that hasn’t been there. Breaking a six game losing streak the Chargers now absolutely have to win to think about breaking even for the season. I’m taking the Bills in this game just because I don’t think the Chargers are for real this season. I could be wrong, because the Chargers have “charged” up late in the season in previous seasons, only to fall short come the playoffs. But those charges were contingent on the Broncos losing, which I don’t think they are going to do. Bills to somehow prevail on the road.

St. Louis at Seattle Line: -0.0
Meh. The Rams are nothing short of terrible, and the Seahawks somehow still have a chance at making the playoffs. They beat the Eagles, but so what? The Rams shouldn’t be much of a challenge, but who knows with this team? Taking the home team cause it’s easy. Seahawks at home.

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Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 4

Thursday, September 29th, 2011

Can McFadden run the Patriots defense into the ground?

Not bad last week. I went a very respectable 12-4 (34-14 on the season, or 71%.) That being said, I think that picking the Bills to correctly upset the Patriots was huge. More on that in a moment. This is a very volatile season so far, with a lot of exciting games. Thankfully the NFL RedZone is now in HD on my local Comcast network, so I get to watch Scott Hanson in glorious HD. Scott probably has the greatest job in all of sports broadcasting. I really wouldn’t be able to write this column without Scott and the Red Zone. Anywho, another big week with some match-ups that can change the season. Can the Lions and Bills continue winning? The bookies don’t seem to think so, as neither team is favored on the road. What the hell?

Featured Game

New England at Oakland Line: +4.0 UPSET SPECIAL!!
Wow. Did Tom Brady throw four interceptions, one a pick-six? Or was that some alternate dimension in which those Patriots aren’t that great? Aside from Brady looking deceptively not like a passing robot, Wes Welker killed it. Did you have him on your fantasy team? Lucky you. The Patriots defense has got to tighten up. They give up too much on the run and don’t seem to recognize running backs when lined up on the outside. Some sweet Buffalo play fakes came off a Patriots defense sleeping on the job. Belichick got out Belichicked by Chan Gailey on that final scoring play. That was some smart coaching. Enough about the Pats. Oakland is coming off a huge win over the Jets, dominating on the ground and making the supposedly strong Jets run defense look like amputated children. What do you think they are going to do – at home – against the Pats? Run them ragged that’s what. And I don’t think one week is long enough for the Pats to fix their problems on defense. So once again, my featured game is also my upset special as I’m taking the Raiders to give the Pats their second loss of the season, and push them to get better on defense. I did pick the Pats as a playoff team, so don’t get used to me picking them to lose. This just isn’t going to be their week. Oakland at home.

Tailgate City (The Rest)

Carolina at Chicago Line: -5.0
Ouch. The Bears, who looked moderate on defense against the Packers get to welcome the Panthers to town this week. The Bears are not looking like the playoff team that we saw last year, and Cutler is tired of being sacked so damn much. Normally one would tell him to quit whining, but his pocket just collapses on him completely and he’s got no where to run. Until they fix this issue, they won’t compete in their division. Thankfully, the Panthers aren’t in their division. Coming off a muddy win against the hapless Jags, Cam Newton put up human looking stats, but that might have been due to the weather. I’m looking for Carolina to go pass wacky on the Bears, but the Bears defense to shut them down effectively. Bears to win at home.

Buffalo at Cincinnati Line: -3.0
Genius play calling by Chan Gailey (as previously mentioned) cemented the Bills upset of the Pats last week. Not to mention a comeback from being down 21-0 at one point. The Bills are showing they are a second half team, and hard to beat when they are scoring constantly. Their defense also stepped up, picking Brady four fucking times! So why in the fuck nuts are they not favored going into Cincinnati? The Bungles lost a shitty game to the Niners, and now are facing probably one of the best scoring teams in the AFC. The Bungles don’t stand a fucking chance in this game. They don’t have the defense and the Bills front line is going to chase Andy Dalton down like the soulless ginger that he is. Bills to win on the road.

Tennessee at Cleveland Line: -2.0
I’ll say this about the Browns, they are scrappy. They pulled off a close win against Miami, but let’s be honest – the Dolphins defense is a joke. Meanwhile, the Browns defense – especially the front line – is getting better and better. The offense was mediocre at best, with Hillis out and Colt McCoy overthrowing the ball like crazy to wide open receivers. As for the Titans, they lost Kenny Britt to a knee injury – but won. Chris Johnson needs to start earning that huge paycheck now and start pushing his way into open field. I don’t think he’ll be able to do that against the Browns though, as they’ve been good on shutting down the run, for the most part. This is going to be a close game, but I’m looking for the Browns to prevail. Browns to win at home.

Detroit at Dallas Line: -3.0
Like Buffalo, the Lions are getting no love from the bookies. They came back in the second half, took advantage of poor defensive play by the Vikings to go 3-0. Now, they travel to take on their Thanksgiving counterparts, the Cowboys. The Lions are showing serious strength on offense, but especially on defense. Romo will give way to Kitna early in this game for sure. The Cowboys played a stinker against the Redskins, winning off six fucking field goals. Romo couldn’t get his team into the end zone, and against a team playing as strong and fast as Detroit, that ain’t gonna cut it. Lions to win on the road.

Minnesota at Kansas City Line: +3.0 CRAPFEST OF THE WEEK!!
The Vikings, the sad pathetic Vikings. They had the Lions right where they wanted them. Once again they blew a big halftime lead and ended up losing the game. That’s three games in a row. What is going on with this team that they can’t hold and keep a league? Oh I know what it is, a crappy secondary that gets exposed late in the game once a good QB can see that they aren’t getting creative at all. Not to mention a serious overuse of big blitzes. Chicago has that problem too. Meanwhile, Kansas City has been terrible. Didn’t they make the playoffs last year? You wouldn’t know it by looking at this team. 18 yards passing for Cassel in the 1st half last week. That’s just sad. However, I think this week the Chiefs get their shit together and win a fucking home game. Chiefs to win.

Washington at St. Louis Line: -1.5
One week the offense looks fantastic, the next week the defense looks fantastic keeping Dallas out the end zone, while the offense totally blows it and keeps themselves out. Really, the Redskins are hard to figure out. I mean, they have the potential to be a certain challenger in the NFC East, but can’t seem to get their collective shit together to win. Could it be coaching? Yes, yes it could be. So they go meet the Rams. The Rams showed up last week. I mean, if you consider that committing drive killing penalties, dropping passes and getting pistol whipped by the Ravens. Do the Rams have a defensive secondary? It didn’t appear so. Didn’t seem to have an offensive line either as Bradford was constantly under pressure. Of course, that was the Ravens. Either way, the Rams just cemented themselves solidly in the “suck” column. So Skins to win on the road.

San Francisco at Philadelphia Line: -0.0
Ok, so Vick’s non throwing hand isn’t broken, but I was right about this Eagles team. They are not the “dream team” and calling them so (and them believing it) is going to kill them. The defense was missing tackles left and right, the secondary couldn’t figure out who Victor Cruz was after his 1st TD, and Vick turned over the ball at the most crucial moment. At least LeSean McCoy had a good game. Which tells me this; because Vick is very mobile, the offensive line is concentrating on opening up lanes for the run and pass, rather than focusing on protecting Vick. This is why he’s scrambling more often than he should, quicker than he should and is leading to mistakes. It’s a dangerous assumption and is probably why they aren’t heavily favored in this match-up. The Niners can win this game, if it was at home. Their defense is playing fine, holding down the running game and making picks, but if Vick has his game face on and actually passes the damn ball (get it to Jackson) the Eagles should win. So I’m taking the Eagles at home.

New Orleans at Jacksonville Line: +6.0
So my boy @mbletsch traded away Drew Brees in his fantasy league. Along with Nelson (Bills), Benson (Bengals) and Hightower he got in return Vick, DeSean Jackson, Mendenhall & Hillis. Ok, I can see the validity of that for most of those guys, but Nelson will have a great year and HOW IN THE HELL CAN YOU TRADE AWAY BREES? Good trade or not? Leave it in the comments. (Update: I was informed this trade was vetoed by the league, as they thought MB was trade raping the other guy. I don’t see it. Brees is worth all that and more.)

That being said, Brees is going to have a banner day against the non-existent secondary of the Jags. The only reason they held up against the Panthers is because of the weather. The Saints defense is going to tear Blaine Gabbart to shreds like a topless hooker during Mardi Gras. That kid will be in tears by the end of the night. Now, this could be one of those weird upsets, but this shit isn’t college football. The Jags are outclassed, and it will show. If you have a Saints player on your fantasy team, any player, make sure he’s starting this week. Saints to win on the road.

Pittsburgh at Houston Line: -3.0
Being a Steelers fan sometimes has got to be stressful. One second Ben is fumbling the ball (twice last week) the next he’s leading a game winning drive down the field. That’s some up and down shit right there. The Steelers had to come back to beat the Colts, who are still without a decision at QB. That helped the Steelers, who still struggled with the run. They won’t have much better luck against Houston, who nearly beat the Saints. They fell apart in the fourth quarter though, an interesting trend that may help the Steelers. The passing game for both teams is aces, it’s going to come down to defensive line play, and turnovers (don’t they all.) I’m really stalling on this one because as much as I want to pick the Steelers, I think Houston takes this one at home.

New York at Arizona Line: -3.0
Kolb must have been excited as he led a possible game winning drive against the Seahawks, then tossed an interception. This is par for the course for the Cardinals, who have a lame passing attack at best and have yet to establish a running game. Which means no play action, which means Kolb is linebacker bait. Blitz the Cardinals and watch them scramble. Which is something I’m sure the Giants can do after watching them pressure the shit out of Vick. The Giants are playing strong up front and not letting any offense take advantage of them. While the Arizona offense might show some early spark, the Giants D should put it right out. Giants to win on the road.

Atlanta at Seattle Line: +3.5
I blinked, and the Seahawks actually won a game. With defense. Of course, it was against the Cardinals. It’s sad, but the Seahawks could win the division with a losing record again. Any of the shitty teams in the NFC West could really. They actually rushed too, for over 100 yards. Crazy. Who knew? The Falcons are going to come into Seattle hot. They lost to their rivals in Tampa and are pissed. The offense was stifled, the defense played well though, but without the offensive backup is probably pissed. The Falcons are in Hulk mode for sure, and the east to west coast plane ride isn’t going to change that. Falcons to win on the road.

Denver at Green Bay Line: -13.0
The Packers are running well, defense is in the lights out category but I don’t think this team is yet back up to Superbowl champ standards. Whatever. Denver is in town and that means that Rodgers gets to have a little target practice. The Broncos have shown one major thing this season, that they suck. They came close last week, but I wouldn’t be surprised to hear “TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW” chants in Green Bay this weekend. Orton will be too busy running from Clay Matthews and company to hear it though. This one is too easy, but since everyone thinks that, I’m taking the Broncos. Just kidding. Green Bay to win at home.

Miami at San Diego Line: -9.0
And my pick for first coach to get fired this season is Tony Sporano. While Henne is looking good when he can, the Dolphins play calling on both sides of the ball has been stifling bad. They ran into a good defense last week and still couldn’t put the game away when they had the chance. And they had chances. They’ll have more chances against the Chargers, who seem to wilt a bit in the second half. Rivers has a chance to get this team jump started, if he can keep the ball out of the hands of the defense. I suspect that he will, as long as the defense holds up their end of the bargain. The Dolphins will make a game of it though, as they really, really need a win. Chargers to win at home.

NY Jets at Baltimore Line: -3.5
The Ravens put on a mother fucking CLINIC last week. Torrey (who dat) Smith caught three touchdowns in a classic ass whipping of the Rams. The Ravens are nearly unstoppable this year, but it’s only three games into the season. Can the Jets defense stop them? What Jets defense you say? Good point. The supposed tough defense of the Jets was no-where to be found against Oakland last week letting McFadden roll for 171 yards. What do you think Ray Rice is going to do? Tear the Jets a new asshole that’s what. The Jets are outmatched in this game, and it sucks to say that cause I actually like this team. I mean, save for Sanchez and his GQ loving ass. Ravens to win.

Indianapolis at Tampa Bay Line: -10.0
Peyton has got to be considering going all RoboCob just to make a comeback. Painter did ok last week, but against the Bucs defense? A defense that held Matt Ryan to one TD and an INT? The lousy Colts special teams aside, they are going to have trouble against the Bucs defense and the young offense under the charge of Freeman. The Bucs vanquished their rivals last week, what do you think they are going to do to a Colts team that is yet to find their ground? This game is going to be crazy, especially since the Bucs actually managed to sell enough tickets to lift the blackout. The Colts can look at this game like this, it’s just one step closer to being able to draft Andrew Luck #1. Bucs to win at home.

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The Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 8

Thursday, October 28th, 2010

The Jets Flight Crew will be cheering this weekend.

This week I have no choice but to lead with gloating about picking the Cleveland Browns to upset the Saints last week. They turned the spread 180 and beat the Saints in the Superdome thanks to great defensive play. The Madden curse is in full effect with Drew Brees, never more evident than moments after last weeks game when he realized he lost at home to the Browns.

That aside, or including that, I went 10-4 on the week (62-42 on the year.) That’s pretty damn sweet. I should have put some money down. While I got my upset pick right, my crapfest right, I was once again wrong about the Broncos. Fuck you Denver. I’m tired of your shit. Do what I say! Also, the Bills were very surprising last week with their almost victory over the Ravens. I predicted them to lose 34-0 in that game, but they scored 34 and nearly won. It came down to a coin toss. I freaking hate that. They need to institute college rules overtime. Each team gets a chance to score.

So that’s last week. This week, there are some fun match-ups and a game on the other side of the Atlantic (featuring the Broncos.) Week 8 marks the halfway point of the season, so you can go ahead and make your mid-season playoff picks now. For now, here’s my Week 8 picks.

Featured Game:

Green Bay at NY Jets Line: -6.0
The Jets are the best team in the AFC, if not the best team in football. They got last week off, while the Packers got to once again beat the Vikings at home. This game will be good for two reasons. One, to see how Rodgers plays against a very aggressive pass defense and pass rush. Two, to see how the Jets play against a tough run defense and tough pass offense. It’s very interesting, because this could very well be the Superbowl this year. The Jets, Titans or Steelers will be playing the Packers in the Superbowl. At this point I’d be looking at the Jets, but later in the column I’ll say the Titans just because I like to contradict myself. This should be a great game, on both sides of the ball. It’s going to come down to the turnover game to determine the outcome of this one. That being said, taking the Jets at home.

Tailgate City (The Rest):

Miami at Cincinnati Line: -2.0
Man the Dolphins almost pulled it off last week against the Steelers. It was close, what with that late game non fumble fumble. I don’t think the Dolphins would have retained possession anyway. Somehow Henne went for over 250 yards against the Steelers defense, which makes sense since they were spending most of their time protecting the run. This week, the Dolphins hit the road to face the Bengals, who fought hard against the Falcons last week. You know, Palmer is one hell of a QB, but he’s faced with scrambling behind an offensive line that routinely falls apart. How will he fare against the Dolphins pass rush? I’m thinking the Bengals will pull off a close one at home.

Jacksonville at Dallas Line: -6.5
Romo is out. Fractured his left clavicle which brought Jon Kitna into the game. Remember Kitna? The Cowboys haven’t been this bad (1-5) since the first year Jerry Jones bought the team. How they are favored this week is beyond me, but the Jags are no shining stars either. 38 year old Todd Bouman is taking the snaps, and it was a mistake that led to a blowout last week against the Chiefs. The Jags are lacking on pass and rush defense, and I wouldn’t count on their offense to dig them out of a hole. Once they fall behind, they’ll stay behind. Taking the Cowboys at home.

Washington at Detroit Line: -2.5
Even though the Redskins handled the Bears last week in a terrible game (nine turnovers between the two teams) they are still the underdog coming into Detroit. The Lions are coming off a bye week which will only help their cause as a future winning team. They won’t have a winning record this year, but they’ll get close if they can start winning. I don’t think that the Redskins are going to be able to contain Best and their special team defense isn’t that great. The Lions have some speed and could very well burn out the Redskins in this game. I’m taking the Lions at home, another home pick.

Buffalo at Kansas City Line: -8.0
Buffalo shocked all us detractors last week with their near win in Baltimore. I’m guessing they must be reading this column, with me extolling how much they absolutely suck. While their defense was very giving, their offense made up the difference. Matt Cassel has been consistently impressive this season, plus, do any of you have Thomas Jones on your fantasy team? He’s been on fire lately. With that tandem, there is no way the Buffalo defense will be able to hold the game close. Look for Buffalo to come out hot, but fizzle in the end. No overtime for them this week, this game should be decided by the third quarter. Chiefs at home.

Carolina at St. Louis Line: -3.0
The Panthers got their first week last week against the struggling Niners. The Rams aren’t struggling. They aren’t doing fantastic either, and losing to the Bucs last week didn’t help their case, but they are getting much better. The defense for the Rams has been improving every week, actually looking impressive. The Panthers, suck. Which is odd for an NFC South team, which usually boasts tough defenses. I’m looking at the Rams to make a statement this week, that they can beat crappy teams at home. Still, any given Sunday, but I’m still taking the Rams.

Denver at San Francisco Line: -0.0 Crapfest of the Week!
This game takes us to the sunny shores of London. Well, the rain filled shores of London. Frankly, I don’t know why we bother. They like soccer, we like football, get over it. The reason this is my crapfest is that the London games are never good. The jet lag shows on the players, and the fact that this is a regular season game out of the country is a joke. This game should not count against or for any records and should be treated as an exhibition game. So I’m taking a null pick. Broncos have made sure they don’t agree with me at all, like a bad taco, and the Niners are iffy week to week. The only thing that would make me pick the Niners at all would be Troy Smith starting and playing with his childhood friend Ted Ginn Jr. However, null pick.

Tennessee at San Diego Line: -3.5
Kenny Britt, 225 yards and 3 TD’s. That’s a freaking career day for sure. All this thanks to the accuracy of Kerry Collins. The Titans defense is stifling right now, their offense is on fire with both the run and the pass. This is your AFC Superbowl team (providing they don’t lose to the Steelers in the playoffs again.) My advice, leave Young on the bench for now until Collins screws up. They have the rhythm going. The Chargers however, don’t. They’ve been a disappointment this year, and their loss to the Pats last week was terribly sad because it came down to a missed field goal. I’m taking the Titans to win on the road.

Seattle at Oakland Line: -3.0
Wow. Did anyone else watch Oakland land 59 points on the hapless Broncos last week? Where the hell did that team come from? Jason Campbell came in as the backup and led his team, along with McFadden’s 4 TD’s, to a major victory. Everyone got a chance at the ball, and the defense – the defense, in Oakland – freaking killed it. A major surprise, so the question is, can they keep it up? They are favored against the Seahawks, who are once again flying under the radar but quietly holding sole first place in the NFC West. I’m taking the Hawks to win, to bring the Raiders back down to Earth. I know, we’d like to think the Oakland Raiders can dominate once again, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

Minnesota at New England Line: -4.0
Will Favre start? Word on the street is that his ankle problem is a bit glorified and it’s mostly his feelings that are hurt. Well, he’s not going to be in a good mood tonight if he starts against the Patriots. Feeling good are Tom Brady and company after taking out the trash in San Diego. Ok, that was harsh. The Vikings aren’t living up to expectations this year at all. Adrian Peterson can’t carry the team, and hasn’t been carrying the team. When Favre is on, he’s on but he hasn’t been on this year. Brady has been his normal Brady self, and the Patriots defense has been mediocre, but good enough to give the offense and Belichick time to trick the other team into losing. Pats at home.

Tampa Bay at Arizona Line: -3.0
I still hate the Bucs and they got lucky in that crappy game against the Rams last week. One thing I can say is that the Freeman to Winslow connection is starting to look pretty good. If they can work on that, since their defense is no longer the dominant force it once was, then they can continue their winning ways. The Cardinals, a short time ago the NFC representatives in the Superbowl are sitting in a mediocre division watching the Seahawks pull away. QB trouble is clearly plaguing this team, with Max Hall not too much better than Derek Anderson this year. Those inconsistencies plus the high turnover ratio is killing this team. However, I refuse to pick the Bucs, so taking Arizona at home.

Pittsburgh at New Orleans Line: +1.0
The Saints are the only home team not favored this week. If you think the Saints struggled against the Browns defense, wait until they face the Steelers defense. Brees surely wants a bounce back, but this week ain’t gonna be it. The Steelers are going to destroy the Saints at home. They are vulnerable right now, Brees is clearly not himself and the Saints offense is not surprising anyone with their tricks anymore. They are losing the turnover game, they are just playing like a normal NFC team with normal problems. The things is, they are the defending Superbowl champions and have no major injury issues. The Steelers, are playing just like we expect them to be playing. Easy road win pick for the Steelers.

Houston at Indianapolis Line: -5.5 Upset Special!!
And the final game of the mid-season rampage is this divisional match-up. The Texans are setting their sights on the playoffs. Can they make it? Beating the Colts twice in one season would be a great start to the playoff hunt. Both teams got to relax this past weekend, and a Monday night game means even more time to run plays and get a solid game plan. Look for Manning to come out quick against the Houston defense to try to catch them before they get warmed up. However, in the end I’m thinking the Texans will prevail with the upset.

That’s it. Now I’m all depressed. The season is half over, and that means the college season is even closer to being over. I’m too depressed to write more words. I’m gonna go drink a six pack of PBR and watch NFL Tonight.

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The Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 6

Thursday, October 14th, 2010

The Browns vs. Steelers is always just a violent ballet of sport.

After this weekend, the season will be a third of the way finished. The NFL season is a constant reminder as to how short life really is, plus it means I have to start thinking about what to write about after the season is over. Do I write about hockey? Basketball perhaps? Or just spend week after week talking about off-season NFL news that no one really gives a shit about?

Perhaps I’ll just talk about Brett Favre’s penis. Hell, every one else is. Frankly, I find this story hard to believe. Why would Brett have to “sext” a picture of his wrangler to some cheerleader? Can’t he just walk up to her, whip it out and say “Hey, I’m Brett Favre. Wanna intercept my pass?” The whole thing is fishy. The only thing this whole penis story is doing is creating a distraction for the Vikings, something that was quite clear in their Monday night loss to the Jets.

So last week too many of my picks took a serious nose dive late in the games, even though I was right on the upset special (Titans over Cowboys) I was wrong on the Browns and once again, wrong on the Broncos. Overall I went 8-6 which brings me to 44-32 on the season. Still over .500, so I’ve got that going for me. This week I’m going a bit more conservative and going with more home team picks. I think.

Featured Game:

Cleveland at Pittsburgh Line: -14.0
I really wanted to make this my upset special as well, but who am I kidding? The Browns, while seemingly on the upswing are back to Delhomme again, which means they’ll suck just enough to not be a threat to anyone. The big story in this game of course is the return of Big Ben Rothlesberger. Coming off his suspension, will he be rusty or will he be the pillar of the Steelers offense as he has in the past? If this game was in Cleveland, I’d almost pick the Browns to win – almost. What the Browns need to do to compete in this game is pressure the hell out of Big Ben, which they’ve been doing to teams all season – to a point. The Browns are coming off another close loss, while the Steelers are coming back from a bye week. These two teams almost always play each other rough, I don’t see why this week should be any different. However, I do have to pick a team and I pick the Steelers, though I think the Browns will keep it within a score.

Tailgate City (The Rest):

Seattle at Chicago Line: -7.0
The Seahawks didn’t see action last week, which is fine cause aside from the Broncos I have no idea what to say about this team. In fact, I can’t remember who they played last. Let me check… oh yeah, they got pistol whipped by the Rams. What the hell happened there? The Bears are a bit more predictable – or are they? Yeah, they are. Pit them against a crappy run defense and Forte puts down 166 yards and two TD’s. The Hawks have a crappy run defense. Don’t tell them that though, until Forte put over 200 on them. At this point, all Cutler needs to do is hand off. Taking the Bears at home to win.

Miami at Green Bay Line: -0.0
Last week the Packers lost on the road in Washington. Rodgers went out with a concussion and may not play this weekend. It was a close game and went to overtime, but the Packers defense allowed McNabb a healthy 357 yards in the air. Miami is not a dominant passing team, they are a running team and this could be bad for them. If it’s one thing the Packers currently have going for them it’s their run defense. I’m looking for Matt Flynn (2007 LSU National Champion) to start for the Packers, and their defense to give him ample time and points to give the Packers a win. Taking them with the points, which are zero, so that works out well.

San Diego at St. Louis Line: +8.5
Really Chargers? Losing to Oakland? The hapless Raiders? What the hell happened to the Chargers? Rivers threw for 431 yards. Floyd had 213 yards receiving. You don’t lose games with stats like that. How about the fumble by the Chargers returned by the Raiders for a touchdown? Yeah, you lose on stats like that. The Chargers proved once again – you lose the turnover game – you lose the game. The Chargers should get back on track this week, as the Rams showed against the Lions they have no pass defense to speak of. Calvin Johnson of the Lions was catching passes in triple coverage. The Rams will lose at home, I don’t even think they’ll beat the spread.

Baltimore at New England Line: -3.0
Ray Rice ran for 133 yards and two touchdowns against the Broncos last week. Considering I have no idea if the Broncos are even real, since I can’t pick them for anything to save my life, I have no idea what the Ravens did last week. Let’s start fresh. They are a strong defensive team, obviously. This is the Patriots first week without Moss, which should be a little odd. Who is the deep threat now? The real question is, can the Ravens defense stop Welker from getting the ball? I don’t think so. I’m taking the Patriots to win. Straight up.

Detroit at NY Giants Line: -8.0 UPSET SPECIAL!!
You have got to be kidding me. I’m taking the Lions to upset the Giants in New York? What the hell is wrong with me? I mean, yeah the Lions beat the crud out of the Rams last week, but that was the Rams. But I think that the Lions have broke through whatever it was keeping them down up until this week. The Giant defense is going to be after Shaun Hill like a mongoose after a cobra, but I also think they will have a hard time catching up with Best. The Giants run game is iffy, and the Lions actually have a competent pass defense. This game is either going to be a complete blowout by the Giants, proving me dead wrong, or it’s going to be a close win by the Lions, surprising everyone and proving me right. To put it bluntly, Lions to upset. Mark the tape.

Atlanta at Philadelphia Line: -3.0
Atlanta should have lost last week to the Browns. A late interception run back for a touchdown put the game away for the Falcons and they racked up a win. The Eagles had a tough time against the Niners and haven’t been the same team since McNabb left. However, the Eagles do get to play at home this week and the Falcons aren’t looking that great lately. Not to mention they took a beating last week from the Browns constant pressure defense. Eh, I’m taking the Eagles to win but only because they are at home.

New Orleans at Tampa Bay Line: +5.0 CRAPFEST OF THE WEEK!!
Betcha didn’t see that coming. Yes, the Bucs did win last week, and yes I hate them with a passion. Also, the Saints are the reigning Superbowl champs. But both these teams aren’t that good when you break them down. The Bucs, at 3-1 haven’t played a quality opponent besides the Steelers, who whomped them. The Saints are on a terrible down spiral, most likely the Sports Illustrated curse. On a side note, the curse also got David Price of the Tampa Bay Rays, who lost both of the playoff games he started. No matter which way this game goes, and it really could go either way, the Saints are the team that is supposed to win. Plus, I’m not picking the Bucs at all this year. So Saints to win, and hell, with the points.

Kansas City at Houston Line: -4.5
Well, the Chiefs are no longer unbeaten. They lost in a squeaker (ok, a ten point squeaker) to Indy last week. They played the Colts tough, and wrapped up Addai pretty well but couldn’t keep Vinatieri from kicking four field goals. The Texans met a new friend last week called “The Giant Defense.” While they wrapped up the Giants run pretty well, they couldn’t stop Eli’s arm. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that the Texans are going to have some serious trouble against tough defenses. Go figure. However, I’m going to take them to win at home just cause I still want to see them do well this year.

NY Jets at Denver Line: +3.0
What the hell Denver? Can you not do what I predict? I have been wrong every single week when picking the Broncos to win or lose. This week the decision isn’t that difficult, the Jets are motoring on their way to the playoffs. You get in their way – like the Vikings last week – you will lose. That’s about all there is to it. This one is easy, I don’t care what the Broncos did last week. I’m tired of picking them to do anything, so I’m picking the Jets to win, with the points.

Oakland at San Francisco Line: -7.0
The Raiders beat the Chargers! The Raiders beat the Chargers! The Raiders beat the Chargers! This chant was heard in playgrounds all over Southern California on Monday. The Raiders beat the Chargers! In San Francisco, the chant is probably more like “The Niners Suck. Period.” Okay, they didn’t suck too much against the Eagles last week, only a last minute fumble by Alex Smith lost the game for them. Sitting at 0-5, the Niners are the worst they have been in 31 years. Montana is burning his jerseys right now. Steve Young is driving his lawn mower in disgust. However, Niners faithful take note – they will win this week. Finally.

Dallas at Minnesota Line: -1.5
This is the game that will decide the season for one of these two teams. One of these teams will win and go on to either at least a winning season or break even. The other team will self destruct and fall apart into a muddled mess of drama and crappy play. The former is going to be the Cowboys. The latter is going to be the Vikings. There are too many distractions, Favre’s elbow is feeling shitty and the team just isn’t playing well. Moss isn’t going to help them against the Cowboys, who even though they lost to the Titans last week, are still a strong team. I’m picking the Cowboys to win on the road.

Indianapolis at Washington Line: -3.0
The Colts couldn’t do shit against the Chiefs last week. Really. Without a competent field goal kicker they would have lost that game. I was a bit surprised because I though the Colts offense was stronger than that. Not to take too much away from the Chiefs, but the Colts should have run away with that game. They didn’t. The Redskins showed that they are not a one hit wonder with their convincing win against the Packers. They knocked the shit out of Rodgers and made the Packers look a bit confused on the road. For that reason alone, I’m taking the Redskins to beat the Colts. They have a very aggressive defense and if you come after Peyton with that, he’s going to slip up.

Tennessee at Jacksonville Line: +3.0
The Titans upset the Cowboys last week, in the big house under the giant television sets. Chris Johnson ran for 131 yards and became the new one yard man on the goal line. He proved that he doesn’t need to be built like a dump truck to do it. The Jags looked like they were taking the Bills for granted for a couple quarters, then woke up and smacked them around a little bit. This game could be interesting on several levels, none of which I can think of at the moment. Mostly I’m thinking about grilled cheese sandwiches and bourbon. Yes, together. You ever dip a grilled cheese sandwich in bourbon? Delicious. Oh, Titans to win.

That’s Week 6 in a can. Thank the football gods that I wasn’t forced to say anything about the Bills this week. You know what? I will anyway. The Bills looked like a team that wanted to win last week. Maybe they were reading this column. Who knows. Either way, they fell apart in the fourth quarter and lost the game. Wake up Bills! Other than that, Hockey season is underway so I’m gonna go watch the Lightning game, someone bring me a sixer of Molson Ice.

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The Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 5

Thursday, October 7th, 2010

Last week I went 8-6 (36-26 on the season.) That’s because my last two picks, the Bears and Dolphins were emotional and not logical. Remind me never to do that again. Meanwhile, the good news is I picked the Browns to win and they did, and McNabb and the Redskins upset the Eagles. The bad news is that the Colts lost to the Jags, and the Titans lost to the Broncos. I still don’t know about the Broncos.

So what’s the biggest news this week in the NFL? Well, how about Randy Moss heading back to the Vikings? The trade with the Patriots was completed with them getting a third round pick in exchange for him. Fantastic. We know what Bellichick can do with a late round pick. And now, Brett Favre has that deep threat. More on that in a minute.

So it’s Week 5 of the NFL season! That means we’re almost a third of the way through the season already, who have you got for the playoffs? So lean back in your Lazy-Boy (or most likely a tattered lawn chair on your linoleum floor) and get ready for some more superfluous picks. Oh, and good news – the “crapfest of the week” returns this week. Bonus.

Featured Game:

Minnesota at NY Jets Line: -4.0
Moss returns to Minnesota. Not only is that the huge storyline here, with subplots of will Favre throw to him and will that clear up Harvin for more long balls, but the Jets come in as the best in the AFC. I don’t think that’s just my opinion. They are playing superior ball right now, yeah they whipped up on the Bills, but this is going to be the game that sets them apart. Their secondary has proven that they have no problem covering Moss, almost nullifying him in their game against the Patriots. They’ll do the same this week against the Vikings on Monday night. Yeah, Favre will have Moss as a distraction to the secondary, but his pre-requisite two interceptions are going to kill him against the Jets. Not to mention the Vikings haven’t been that great against the run, which the Jets establish early and establish hard. I’m taking the Jets to win, with the points.

Tailgate City (The Rest:)

Jacksonville at Buffalo Line: +1.0
The Jags pulled off a major upset against the Colts, but it’s not too much of a surprise, as they always play the Colts pretty tough. It wasn’t a majorly impressive performance by the Jags, even though Jones-Drew put over a 100 yards against the Colts defense. Which means he’ll probably put 200+ over on the Bills. The Bills, well I’ll say it again – they don’t want to win. They aren’t playing like they feel like winning. Even with the coaching change, this franchise is in trouble. Now at 0-4, they aren’t showing anything except the constant frustration of Fitzpatrick. Do they have the offense that could explode? Sure. Do they have a competent defense? No, they suck. Well, there you have it. They drop to 0-5 when they lose to the Jags.

Tampa Bay at Cincinnati Line: -7.0
I live in Tampa and I am not a Buccaneers fan. I can’t stand them. Never did, and never will be a Bucs fan. That being said, I’m happy for the blackouts. This one won’t be blacked out because it’s an away game. Last week the Bucs sat happy at home with a bye while the Bengals got beat down by the Browns. The game was close, and Palmer did his damnedest to bring the team back, but it wasn’t enough. The bright spot was T.O. ripping off 222 yards and a touchdown. The key is going to be slipping behind the Bucs secondary, who appears to only have Rhonde Barber playing for them. Shouldn’t be a problem. Taking the Bengals to win.

Atlanta at Cleveland Line: +3.0
Cleveland, unlike the Bills, look like a team that wants to win. They are 1-3, but those three losses were close ones. The win was close as well, but it was a win. Seneca Wallace was moderate as the starter, it’s a matter of time before Colt McCoy is starting. The highlight was rookie Peyton Hillis going for 102 yards on 27 carries against a usually tough Bengals front line. The kid can run. The Falcons sure did have a lot of trouble against the Niners last week, ending the win on a 42 yard field goal. This game could really go either way, but the Browns are only improving while the Falcons seem to be having trouble, even at 3-1, finding their stride. I’m taking the Browns to win for the second week in a row.

St. Louis at Detroit Line: -3.0 CRAPFEST OF THE WEEK!!
The Rams won last week. Let me say that slower for you – the – Rams – won – last – week. Bradford threw for nearly 300 yards and the Rams defense (did you even realize they had one) sacked Hasselbeck four times, had an interception and forced one fumble. They won the turnover game, and won the game. However, this week they travel to Detroit to play the Lions. The Lions (0-4) put 331 passing yards on the Packers, and almost pulled off a comeback against them. Again. The Lions are right there, right there – almost a winning team. This game is between two sub-par teams, which is why it’s the crapfest of the week, but the Lions will win this week, finally.

Kansas City at Indianapolis Line: -8.5
The Chiefs had a bye week last week, but are showing they are a team not to be underestimated. Their running game is getting better, their special teams are outstanding and Cassell is only getting better as a starter. They travel to Indy to face the Colts, who are still red from their loss to the Jags. The Jags ran all over them, which bodes well for the Chiefs. I almost want to make this my upset special, but I have a better one in mind for that honor this week. The Colts will win at home against the Chiefs, but it’s going to be close. I’d take the Chiefs to beat the spread, but lose the game. Keep in mind, they are the last unbeaten team right now at 3-0.

Green Bay at Washington Line: +3.0
How about them Redskins? McNabb rolls into Philly, gets cheered before the game then jeered during the game. It was a tough win, and brings the Redskins even at 2-2 in what is probably the toughest division in football. Inadvertently taking Vick out of the game may have had something to do with the win, but they pulled off the upset. The Packers, who are an amazing offensive team even without Ryan Grant, roll into town to challenge the Redskins defense. Rodgers is undoubtedly one of the best QB’s in the game, even with his so-so performance against the Lions. I say that because he was held to under 200 yards passing and two interceptions. This game is going to come down to the secondary on both sides and who can win the turnover game. I’m picking the Packers to win this game on the road.

Chicago at Carolina Line: +3.0
The Bears looked like the Bears from last year against the Giants on Sunday night, and not the Bears of the week before. Cutler is playing great ball right now, but couldn’t last against the nine sacks by the Giants in the first half alone – finally knocking him out with a concussion. Then his back-up got knocked out, and the third string guy almost got whacked. This game was all defense, the Bears defense just got tired first. For the Panthers, Clausen is getting better, even leading his team to within a couple points of beating the Saints. But the 0-4 Panthers just have not come together this year as a unit. Their offense, specifically the offensive line, is one of the worst in the leagues. The Bears will roar into town and take down the Cats.

Denver at Baltimore Line: -6.0
Fuck it. I’m taking Denver. I have been wrong about the Broncos all year long so far. I don’t think I’ve picked them right at all yet. They lost when I picked them to win, they won when I picked them to lose. They surprised everyone and took down the Titans last week. The thing was, almost all the yards were through the air. Orton went hog wild, tossing for 341 yards. Rushing yards were a tiny fraction of the total. Tiny. Which means against the Ravens, it’ll be almost nothing. But then, I’ve been wrong about the Broncos every week. So am I picking them because of that or because I think they will win? Mostly because of that. The Ravens, I haven’t been wrong about. Their defense has been keeping the scores close enough for the offense to take control – like against the Steelers last week. Flacco can throw. That being said, I’m still taking the Broncos, which I’ll probably be wrong about.

New York at Houston Line: -3.0
The Giants pulled off a great win against the Bears to stay competitive in their division. They need as many wins as possible. The game for the Giants was all defense. The Giants knocked out two QB’s, ran for over 100 yards, and passed for over 100 yards. They take their defensive show to Houston this week to take on the surging Texans. Even though they had a tough loss to the Cowboys for dominance of Texas, they followed it with a strong win against the Raiders, who showed some defense. I’m taking the Giants to win this one, I hate to do it because I want to see the Texans do well, but I don’t think they are ready for the way the Giants D is finally playing.

New Orleans at Arizona Line: +7.0
Did the Cardinals get their ass handed to them by the Chargers last week? Hell yeah they did. For some reason, I don’t like this team. Not sure why exactly. Derek Andersen got yanked and some kid named Max came in and didn’t do much of anything against the Chargers. Not that the Saints have been impressive at all this year. The wins have been close, where is that explosive offense that we saw last year? The way this team is playing offensively will be enough to lock the division up, but not enough to do it with authority. I think this week they’ll wake up a little bit, but we are still yet to see the high flying Drew Brees offense we saw last year. Could this be the Sports Illustrated curse in action? Saints to win.

Tennessee at Dallas Line: -7.0 UPSET SPECIAL!!
The Titans lost to the unpredictable Broncos last week, while the Cowboys were taking a break from their win over the Texans. Ah, gotta love bye weeks. Which is why I’m thinking that the Titans are going to go strong against the Cowboys this week. Young was shaky late in the game last week, but he didn’t fall apart. The Cowboys defense is pure hot and cold, and I think against Johnson and Young, they are going to be cold. This is going to either be a really close game, or a one sided blow-out. Any given Sunday right? Either way, I’m taking the Titans to win on the road in this weeks upset special.

San Diego at Oakland Line: +6.5
The Chargers smoked the Cardinals last week, so what hope to the Raiders have? The Raiders showed a hint of defense last week against the Texans, holding Foster to 131 yards. Oh wait, he was benched in the first half. Yeah, run against the Raiders and you will gain yards. There isn’t really much more to say here. When Gates and Rivers roll into town, the Raiders aren’t going to be able to compete at that level. Taking the Chargers with that generous point spread.

Philadelphia at San Francisco Line: -3.5
The Eagles lost Vick last week, for who knows how long. Probably 2-4 weeks if it’s the ribs. Which means Kolb finally gets his wish – he gets to start. And he starts off on the West Coast against the struggling Niners. While they have played some close games, they have not become a team to fear. They did fight the Falcons tooth and nail last week, but came up short and gave up a lot of passing yards. Something the Eagles will take advantage of. I’m going against the statistics and taking another road team to win this week, by picking the Eagles – to upset. Seriously? Yeah.

Well, that’s it kids. Another week in the books. Or it will be shortly. As I mentioned earlier, there is only one more undefeated team going in to Week 5, that would be the Chiefs. If they pull off an upset, that’ll just be madness. Meanwhile, a lot of teams just plain suck – the Bills leading the charge in that category. Until next week, crack open a nice ice cold Steel Reserve and enjoy the games.

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The Digital Dads NFL Pre-Game: Week 4

Thursday, September 30th, 2010

Is Charlie Batch really good enough to stand in Big Ben's shoes?

Week 4 brings us the first bye week of the season, which is nice after going 11-5 (28-20 on the season) with my picks last week not including picking the Bills to cover. How about that? Thanks to some fine running by the rookie CJ Spiller, the Bills kept up with the Patriots. Too bad they don’t have the winning spirit. Speaking about fine running, it was nice finally seeing Devin Hester back returning punts. He took one back for a nice return, setting up the Bears for a TD, then taking one back himself for a TD. What the hell was Green Bay doing kicking to him? Who knows, but he sure made them pay for it.

This week sees a lot of divisional match-ups, including the featured game. This is week 4, the make it or break it week. In a season of only 16 games, if teams aren’t showing it now then they probably aren’t going to at all. Remember, all predictions wrong or maybe right depending on whatever The Mystical Smoking Head of Bob tells me.

Featured Game:

Ravens at Steelers Line: -1.5
So are the Steelers for real? Sure, they beat the crap out of the Buccaneers last week with Charlie Batch at the helm, but the Ravens come to town this week. The Ravens defense is just as formidable as the Steelers these days, and you know if Ray Lewis even finds a small crack in the Steelers offensive line he’s going to exploit it. Without the scrambling power of Big Ben, the Steelers might have a problem there. Hines Ward proved he’s still got it, and Batch proved he’s got the arm to hold them over. The Ravens played hard against the Browns and pulled off a win. Considering they should have beat the Browns senseless and didn’t – I’m going with the Steelers at home in Steel City. With the points of course.

Tailgate City (the Rest):

49′ers at Falcons Line: -7.0
Did the Niners play last week? Oh yeah, they were the team getting bitch slapped by Kansas City. The Chiefs beat the crap out of the defenseless Niners, and defense is what they are going to need against the Falcons. They allowed nearly 200 rushing yards and 250 passing yards. Yes, the Chiefs are getting better but that’s just terrible for the Niners. The Falcons will tear their defense apart with their running game, not to mention the accuracy of Matt Ryan these days – who beat the Saints last week. I’m going with the Falcons. Not worrying about the points just in case Frank Gore wakes up.

Jets at Bills Line: +6.0
Thanks to CJ Spiller the Bills stayed in the game against the Patriots, but it just wasn’t enough since there wasn’t enough offense to get ahead. This week they face off against the Jets, who are standing strong with a sober Braylon Edwards. This division is always tough, and should be close this year – except for the Bills. This match-up is going to go for the Jets, who will move to 3-1 on their way to the playoffs. Taking them with the points.

Bengals at Browns Line: -3.0
Browns suck. Bengals, aren’t that great either. Yeah, they are sitting at 2-1 but they played a crappy game against the Panthers. Yes, they won but Palmer tossed two interceptions and had to count on mistakes by the Panthers to do so. The Browns aren’t much better, but if you’ve been watching them (all three of you) you might notice that unlike the Bills, they suck but seem to actually want to win. Their defense is only getting better, the only problems they have seem to be at Quarterback with a little bit of inconsistency with Seneca Wallace. I haven’t picked the Browns yet this season, even though they are my team. I’m taking them this week to rack up their first win of the season.

Lions at Packers Line: -14.5
Rodgers went for 300+ yards last week against a tough Bears team on Monday night. The Packers lost, but it had more to do with their 18 penalties than good play by the Bears. That’s right, 18 penalties. That’s a team record, and a team low. The Pack should rebound this week as they face the not-so-hapless Lions at home. The Lions are a team not to be underestimated. Yeah, they are 0-3 and just got whipped by the Vikings, but they are right on the cusp of being a strong competitor. Sadly, it won’t be this week. Though like I mentioned last week, I hate 14.5 point spreads. I’m just taking the Pack to win.

Broncos at Titans Line: -7.0
Two weeks ago I picked the Broncos to lose, they won. Last week I picked them to upset the Colts, they didn’t. So I’m still not sure what to think of this team. Even in a loss to the Colts, Orton threw for a personal best 476 yards. So he’ll be taking his passing game into Tennessee to face the Titans, who forced 3 turnovers by the Giants, enabling Chris Johnson to finally break free, running for 125 yards and two touchdowns. The Broncos will keep this one close, but I have to stick with the Titans on this one and take them to win at home.

Seahawks at Rams Line: +1.5
What happened last week? The Rams won that’s what happened. Stephen Jackson went out injured and it was up to back-up RB Kenneth Darby to score the go-ahead touchdown to beat the Redskins. This win shouldn’t give the Rams too much hope since the Redskins literally fumbled the game away to them. The Seahawks pulled off a hell of an upset against the Chargers with Leon Washington returning two second-half kickoffs for touchdowns. Note to the Rams: don’t kick to Washington. Taking the Seahawks on the road.

Panthers at Saints Line: -14.0
The Panthers are surprisingly terrible this season thus far. They should have kept Delhomme. At least he had some report with the receivers. Instead, they have teetered between Matt Moore and rookie Jimmy Clausen, who got punked in his first NFL start last week, with his team losing the turnover battle against the Bengals. This week they get to travel to play the Saints, who are coming off a tough overtime loss against the Falcons. The Panthers are in for a treat. I hope Clausen is paying attention, because Brees is going to put on a clinic against the Panthers shoddy defense. The Panthers will be lucky to beat the spread.

Texans at Raiders Line: +3.5
What happened to the Texans last week? They seemed to run into a brick wall against the Cowboys, literally. Their top ranked offense was held to 340 combined yards in their loss. The Raiders, are still the Raiders. Only a missed field goal kept them from winning against the Cardinals in a highly penalized game. The Texans should bounce back this week against the Raiders defense who really isn’t playing that bad, but not good enough to stop Andre Johnson and Arian Foster, the NFL’s leading rusher. Taking the Texans on the road.

Colts at Jaguars Line: +8.5
The Colts solidified their status as one of the premier teams in the NFL last week with their drubbing of the Broncos, who seemed hapless against the Colts offense, allowing Manning to go his usual 300+ yards and 3TD’s. The only down point on the Colts was that the defense did allow Orton to go crazy through the air racking up 476 yards. Crazy! The Jaguars got pounded by the Eagles, giving the sports bobbleheads a reason to blow smoke up Vick’s ass for a week. Whatever. It more about the Jaguars just plain sucking than Vick being awesome. The Jags don’t stand a chance this week. Colts with the points.

Redskins at Eagles Line: -6.5 UPSET SPECIAL!!
Welcome home McNabb. Donovan ambles into Philly for the first time this season. I say ambles because the Redskins took it in the backside from the Rams. The Rams. The Eagles and new starter Mike Vick whipped up on the Jags, but was it really Vick? The Redskins, even after the Rams loss, still have a defense on the cusp of being strong as all get out. The key to this game is stopping Vick, and avoiding beer bottles thrown onto the field at McNabb. I’m taking McNabb to blow up and beat his former team at home.

Cardinals at Chargers Line: -8.5
The Cards got lucky last week against the Raiders, they played a crappy game full of penalties on both sides and frankly, shouldn’t have won at all. This week they head to face the Chargers, who are a team without L.T. They just don’t seem like the same team. Even though Rivers went for 455 yards last week, the Chargers special teams may as well have not even walked onto the field. The Cardinals have some serious speed in their game, the Chargers are going to have to be on theirs to contain them. I’m taking the Chargers to win, but the Cardinals to keep it close.

Bears at Giants Line: -3.0
Note to the Giants, if you kick to Devin Hester you will lose. The Bears took advantage of a sloppy game by the Packers last week and some great returns from Hester to get the win against their rivals. Now they take their show on the road on Sunday night to face Eli and his receivers. This game is going to come down to the Bears secondary stopping the receiving core of the Giants. Considering that same secondary still allowed 300+ yards in the air to the Packers last week, that could be a problem. The Giants are hurting, they are undisciplined and seem to be a mismanaged team at this point. Is this the week they clean up their act? I don’t think so. I’m taking the Bears on the road.

Patriots at Dolphins Line: +1.0
Tom Brady is the new king of Monday night. There is no denying that. It used to be Brett Favre, Montana before that. Now it’s Brady and there is no way this isn’t going to be a fantastic game down in South Florida under the lights. The Dolphins dropped a heart breaker to the Jets with Henne finding great rhythm with his new receiver Brandon Marshall. Marshall netted 166 yards and a TD on ten receptions. Can the shaky Patriots defense hold back Henne and Marshall taking them deep? Just because I promised the big daddy of Digital Dads (CC Chapman) I’m taking the Dolphins at home. I think that spread is about accurate though.

You may have noticed there is no crapfest of the week, as all the match-ups look pretty good. This will be a good week of football, especially if you have the NFL RedZone like me. And a twelve pack of PBR. Like me. And a grill that will be turned on for most of the afternoon – like me. Enjoy!

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