From 9-7 week one to 7-9 week two, you can only assume that this week I’ll go 5-11. Not sure where I went wrong, I picked the Carolina upset, but put too much faith in the Bears and the RedSkins. Not to mention the Cowboys losing and the Broncos losing in spectacular fashion. Pretty sure that this tear of bad allergies I’ve been on lately has clouded my vision when it comes to picking these games. I don’t think in my decade of doing this I’ve ever started out this bad. That makes me 50% on the season so far and that sucks major sack.
Speaking about sacks, the Bills grew a pair and slaughtered the Chiefs in Buffalo. Then Vick won again, this time against the Ravens. I’m telling you, this guy is a fraud and he will be outed as a fraud soon enough. It’s tough to say week two who the winners and losers are really going to be. We have some surprising 2-0 teams and some really surprising 0-2 teams. Then we have standout rookie QB’s and mostly non-standout rookie QB’s. There isn’t a split there. Then we have the Patriots, who I predicted to go 16-0. Then we have the Browns, who are 0-2, but scrappy as hell still. Then we have… nevermind, it’s a mess.
So while DigitalDads glorious leader CC Chapman is off in Spain speaking at some conference about something related to something or other, the rest of us schulbs get to stay here and not eat cool food. But, we get to watch football. So take that CC! Either way, the picks are in, my mind is set (not really) and here comes week three, starting with another Thursday night game. Damn deadlines. Last weeks column was a lengthy 2500 words, I’ll be keeping that count lower going forward. At least, I hope. Seems like I’m losing you all after the open. On with the picks!
New York at Carolina +2.5 UPSET SPECIAL!!
How close the Giants were to going 0-2, but Eli is a professional and took control late in the game once again to beat the Bucs. This week, Bradshaw is sidelined which means the running game might struggle a little bit. Carolina surprised the Saints last week, and looked good doing it. They did it on the ground, which goes against defensive gameplans when playing against Cam Newton. That is, he didn’t run everything. I’m taking the Panthers to upset.
St. Louis at Chicago -7.0
Last week I underestimated the Rams and over estimated the Bears. The Rams won on a late field goal miss by the Redskins, but were with them the whole game. I wouldn’t say Bradford looked sharp for once, cause he didn’t, but the defense looked a whole hell of a lot better. Cutler is already under fire from Bears fans and talking heads, for what? Losing against Green Bay? Give me a break. Bears are solid. Bears to win at home.
Buffalo at Cleveland +3.0 CRAPFEST OF THE WEEK!!
Pretty much every Browns game will be the crapfest of the week. This team is plucky, but they aren’t going to get the wins by staying in the game. If anything, the thing that has kept them in the game has been opposition defense. The Bills defense isn’t as great as beating the Chiefs would make them seem. That was all Bills offense. This after a week in which Fitzy threw like 100 interceptions. Expect him to throw more against Cleveland. This game could go either way, and even though I predicted the Browns to go 1-15, I’m taking them to win this week.
Tampa Bay at Dallas -9.0
That line is really deceiving. The Bucs defense is strong and made Eli Manning look like a rookie last week. Meanwhile, the Cowboys took a drubbing at the hands of the Seahawks. I didn’t see many highlights from this game on the Cowboys side. I expect the Bucs to stay in the game, maybe get damn close to winning it, but I’m taking the Cowboys to bounce back this week with a home win.
Detroit at Tennessee +4.0
So far this season Calvin Johnson isn’t really living up being my first round pick in many fantasy leagues. Instead, the Lions are relying on the ground game of Smith and a lot of tight end involvement. Ok, I can dig on that. The Titans are hurting, taking another beating this past week. Locker is back in the game, but he’s not any good yet. Of course that offensive line isn’t helping much. Detroit should send the Titans to 0-3.
Jacksonville at Indianapolis -3.5
Another beating last week were the Jags at the hands of the Texans. They just couldn’t stop the run to save their lives. While the Colts don’t have the strongest running game, their defense is starting to mesh a little bit and they held Peterson to 60 yards last week. Luck is syncing with his receivers and I’m telling you, this team is going to surprise you. Colts to win.
NY Jets at Miami +3.0
Yet another ass whipping last week, but the Dolphins were on the winning side of it. Who knew? Reggie Bush rushed for 172 yards in one fucking game! If you thought he was done, he ain’t. Bush faces a stingy run defense, but a secondary that gives up a lot of yards. Tannehill is going to have to come out of his rookie shell a bit if he hopes to beat the Jets. Sanchez isn’t the best QB, but he can find the holes in a crappy secondary just as good as any other QB. Jets to win.
San Francisco at Minnesota +6.0
This is pretty easy to pick. The Vikings aren’t that good at all. Ponder is going to find himself backing up Tannehill next year if he doesn’t get it going with his receivers. The defense is terrible, the offensive line is shaky… the Niners are going to tear them a new one. Niners to win.
Kansas City at New Orleans -9.5
The Saints are the best 0-2 team. I hate writing that. That’s so cliche. What a flaming pile of turd. Sadly, they are. The Chiefs by no account should be able to handle the Saints, and the Saints were bested by better teams, I think. Anyway, the Chiefs are having trouble getting any offense going this season and the Saints really, really need a win. Saints at home.
Cincinnati at Washington -2.0
Oh man, the Redskins were so close to starting off the season 2-0, but a late missed field goal kept them from the win. Other than that, this is the best this team has looked in years. They finally have a franchise QB and while he doesn’t quite have the receiver core he’s going to need for the future, RGIII is looking good. The Bengals almost lost to the Browns, so, Redskins to win.
Philadelphia at Arizona +5.5
Ugh. I dislike both these teams. Vick is a piece of shit and has gotten lucky the past two weeks to go 2-0. Both times, he should have lost. The Cardinals surprised everyone last week with their pretty clean win against the Patriots. It wasn’t a blowout, they nearly lost save for the Patriots taking too many late penalties. The Cardinals aren’t ready for the basement in the NFC West this year. Cards to win at home and surprise the Eagles.
Atlanta at San Diego -3.0
Does Philip Rivers have a new favorite tight end? Dante Rosario with two touchdowns last week, Antonio Gates with zero. How many of you have Rosario on your fantasy team? So many teams are running dual TE sets right now, it’s hard to pick just one and stick with him. I suggest going with the match-ups and picking one up off waivers. Basically, whomever is playing the Browns. I’d pick the Chargers any other day, but the Falcons defense made Manning look like a chump last week. They are playing great across the middle of the field, where Rivers likes to throw. I’m taking the Falcons to win. Not just cause I have Ryan, Falcons D & Tony Gonzalez on my fantasy team.
Houston at Denver +1.0
As much as I want to pick Denver to win this game, as much as I want to see Peyton do well in Denver, the Texans have one of the best past rushes and the best running games in the league. Foster is going to shred the Denver defense, who then will be shredded in the air. The only hope for Denver is that Peyton gets his communication with the offensive line straightened out because they were a mess last week. He’s bringing years of chicken calling at the line to a line that isn’t used to it. Houston to win on the road.
Pittsburgh at Oakland +3.0
Carson Palmer threw for nearly 400 yards against the Dolphins, yet still looked like shit. There was no running game, and that was against a mediocre defense. How do you think they are going to do against a good rush defense in the Steelers? Not so well. Eventually the Steelers have to play the Ravens twice, but not this week. Steelers to win on the road.
New England at Baltimore -3.0 GAME OF THE WEEK!!
I was screaming at the television as Flacco, with nearly two minutes left in the game against the Eagles, kept flinging the ball to short yardage or outlet receivers, or going for it deep, rather than just get it to Rice. Rice was tearing up the Eagles all game, they couldn’t handle him. He didn’t touch the ball but once on an outlet pass in that final possession. So the Eagles won and the Ravens looked like tools. Same thing for New England, they had a final chance to drive for a field goal and win it, but penalties and Brady flinging the ball around like a wild man kept them from it. It made no sense. Seemed like panic coaching. Both coming off a loss, this game is a replay of the AFC Championship last year, in which the Ravens should have won. So I’m picking them to win this week instead. I know, I predicted the Pats to go 16-0, obviously that’s not going to happen.
Green Bay at Seattle +6.0
Wow. All I have to say is wow about the Seahawks. I mean, who saw that coming? The whole team came together and Russell Wilson looked damn good for a rookie QB. He was making smart decisions and picking apart that Cowboys secondary for first downs. But it was the veteran Lynch that really put the Cowboys away. Green Bay though is coming off a week and a half rest, a re-energized defense. They still don’t have much of a running game, but they are the stronger team. I’m sticking with the Packers on this one.