What’s a hard drive? To my dad, it was that long car trip down to Florida. To my daughter, well, it’s that computer thingie. And here are another 25 definitions that divide my father and my kid:

Get Busy
To my father: To occupy yourself.
To my kid: To occupy yourself having sex.

Cougar
To my father: Large wild cat preying on deer.
To my kid: Older wild woman preying on younger men.

Godfather
To my father: Marlon Brando movie.
To my kid: Herman Cain pizza.

Betty Ford
To my father: First lady.
To my kid: Celebrity rehab.

Muffin top
To my father: Top of a muffin.
To my kid: Fat roll around the waist.

LBJ
To my father: Lyndon Baines Johnson, President.
To my kid: Lebron James, traitor.

Gangster, now as “gangsta”
To my father: Al Capone.
To my kid: Fifty Cent (aka “Fitty“).

Fifty
To my father: 50.
To my kid: The new 40.

Sick
To my father: Physically ill.
To my kid: Fantastic.

Ill
To my father: Physically sick.
To my kid: Also fantastic.

Ecstasy
To my father: A trance-like state of absolute euphoria.
To my kid: A pill, to produce a trance-like state of absolute euphoria.

Energy Drink
To my father: Coffee.
To my kid: Red Bull.

Vietnam
To my father: Horrendous war.
To my kid: Wonderful tourist destination.

Crib
To my father: Where a baby sleeps.
To my kid: Where a rapper sleeps.

ED
To my father: Talking horse of old TV show (“A horse is a horse, of course of course…”)
To my kid: Erectile dysfunction (“Seek immediate medical attention for an erection lasting over four hours.”)

Wicked
To my father: Very bad.
To my kid: Very good.

Train wreck
To my father: A train that was wrecked.
To my kid: Lindsay Lohan (See “Betty Ford”)

Madonna
To my father: The lady in the Beatles song.
To my kid: “The Lady Gaga of the time she was famous.”

Blackberry & Apple
To my father: Fruit & fruit.
To my kid: Phone & computer.

Privacy
To my father: All he wanted when he went to the bathroom.
To my kid: “Isn’t that, like, a control, or something on websites?”

Starbucks
To my father: Skater Jo Jo, quarterback Terry Bradshaw’s ex-wife.
To my kid: Ubiquitous purveyor of overpriced java drinks.

Leonardo
To my father: Da Vinci.
To my kid: DiCaprio.

Chill
To my father: What you do to wine.
To my kid: What you do to relax.

Dope
To my father: Someone stupid, a dolt.
To my kid: Something cool, exciting.

House
To my father: The place one lives, if not foreclosed.
To my kid: The music one listens to, if not Justin Bieber.

Code
To my father: A system of principles <moral> or of signals for communication <Morse>.
To my kid: A system written by computer programmers wearing wool caps and headphones, while chilling to dope house music.

Any others can you think of?

Photo Credit: Neil McIntosh

•