Aw crap. Now the Boston fans will be all giddy. (Image: AP)

Welcome readers. If you’ve been hanging around here for the past couple months or so, you know that I am responsible for a weekly NFL column of which my picks are generally 60% right. However, the NFL season is now behind us, so thus begins this column, the Digital Dads Week in Sports (add catchy by-line here) in which I pick a couple sports stories from the past week and discuss. This week, there is no bigger sports story of course than the outcome of the Superbowl, so let’s start with that.

Superbowl XLV

On the surface one could say that this was a classic for the ages. But two things made it less than a classic. The first was sloppy play by both Ben Roethlisberger and the Pittsburgh offensive front. The second was missed catches by the Green Bay receivers. Yes, no game is perfect and this was the Superbowl not some pre-season game, but there were too many mistakes to consider this game a classic by far. By the second (or third) interception by the Green Bay defense, it didn’t feel as gamebreaking. It just felt like the Steelers were falling apart.

Not to mention the halftime show. What the hell? Who in the NFL front office needs to get fired so this never happens again? That was probably the single worst halftime show in the history of the Superbowl. They would have been more successful with Justin Bieber and Slash instead of the Black Eyed Peas. Not only were they a horrible choice for the halftime show, but they sucked! They were off key, their audio kept going out and they were just plain bad. If I was in the stadium I probably would have enjoyed listening to my urine hit the bathroom floor rather than them. Nearly ruined the second half of the game for me.

Thankfully, it was all about the football and no matter the mistakes, the game was fun to watch for the most part. Rodgers has also now promised the Packers faithful that he’ll do it again next year. Good luck buddy, you were lucky to get there this year. Meanwhile, Roethlisberger will spend the offseason not riding a motorcycle and not date raping co-eds.

Fans Sue the NFL, Dallas Cowboys & Jerry Jones Over Seating

During the Superbowl, the Cowboys staff wasn’t able to adequately roll out all their extra seating, displacing about 400 people to watch the game on the television screen within the stadium. These fans were rightfully pissed, and it turns out that they are fans because they are suing, which only a true NFL fan would do – right? They are looking for around $5mm in damages, claiming breach of contract, fraud and deceptive sales practices. Are you fucking kidding me?

Jerry Jones and the Packers are trying to track down all the affected fans because here’s their offer to this group of lawyer happy morons: $2,400 and tickets to next season’s Super Bowl. Or tickets to any Superbowl in the future, including airfare and hotel. That’s a pretty sweet deal, but I’m sure the NFL can do it just a little bit sweeter than that to avoid having to go to court right before the lock-out proceedings start. Regardless, these 400 people should be looking for the settlement, rather than taking this to court because they won’t win, it’ll just look bad for the NFL.

Tampa Bay Rays Sign Manny Ramirez, Johnny Damon

The Boston Red Sox sluggers are being re-united in the crappy ass dome in St. Petersburg FL. Now, I live down in Tampa and am a Rays fan, but this is bullshit. First off, the signing of Damon goes against what the ownership has put out about cutting payroll and sticking with prospects and younger players. Ramirez makes a little sense, since he can still play when he’s healthy. Both of them can hit the ball, but they aren’t going to fill the giant void that has opened in the Rays line-up since losing Crawford to Boston and the rest of the core team elsewhere. The Rays have quickly gone from playoff champions to a joke down here, with the way they are dismantling the team after NOT winning a World Series.

Cleveland Cavaliers Epic Losing Streak

35 losses in 36 games. 25 in a row. The team that was once home to that one guy, what’s his name? Oh yeah, Shaq, no – LeBron. The team that is now without LeBron James is basically no longer a team, proving a long held adage about professional basketball – that certain teams are built around one man and one man only and are unable to perform without him. So the story goes for the Cavaliers, who lost their Micheal Jordan and have become the laughing stock of the league. They can’t rebound, they can’t defend, they can’t shoot.

Dan Gilbert must feel like a mega tool right about now, after promising after James left that the Cavaliers will be competing for a championship before the Miami Heat. Considering the NBA playoff system, that’s a 50/50 shot anyway, but still. Byron Scott is going to be looking for a job pretty soon, he’ll be lucky if he’s cleaning restrooms at a local gym. The reality is this, if the Cavaliers can’t put something together soon to look like an actual professional basketball team they’ll just be shining a glaring lamp on the inherent problems in the NBA. It’s become less of a team sport, and more of a support one guy and watch him make awesome shoe commercials sport.

Carmelo Anthony to Los Angeles Lakers

It’s a rumor, but really – who cares? Carmelo is all but washed up. Sure, he has his good days but he has not played without injury in a while, and he’s a notorious whiner. It’s time for him to hang up his shoes and go coach NBA-B league basketball.

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